This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.
Oh, Chiki…
OP/ED. The OP’s great. I really liked it, but I wish the English text could have been slightly lowered to leave room for the credits. Shit pops in from the sides ‘n whatnot and it’s glorious. The ED? Not so much.
Typesetting. Yeah, it was good. I really liked the text for the upper left image.
Now for the English…
7:43-7:51
They didn’t bother to translate the Japanese in this 8-second interval. On top of that, the three lines that they actually managed to put in the script here were timed wrong. Way to go, guys.
“Is there some kind of trick to holding back? Could you teach me?”
Not quite ellipses, not quite period. Transpunctuary fail? {Please pretend that’s a word.}
Try “You’re just being selfish!” Literal, poorly-worded lines do not run well in comedy shows.
You mean “Even if”
Half-baked isn’t really wrong, per se. But half-assed gets more to the point in just as many words. It doesn’t have as much ambiguity as half-baked does.
They did this at least five times. How stupid can you get? You don’t run from a comma into a capitalized word unless the word is a pronoun or something.
It’s not the Wimbledon, it’s Wimbledon. This would be like saying “I’m going to the New York City!”
I nearly missed this one due to the shittiness of the font.
“Although” in this sense needs to be used in the “Although x, y” format. For example “Although I’m in a competing fansub group, I fucked your mother.”
More like “Shiki-senpai, you went too far.”
What’s with these awkward, awkward lines?
Uhh… How about a little more… oomph?
“Oh yeah, Sawanatsu. I still acknowledge your enthusiasm for the game.” {Flows much better into the next line.}
What is this, the Release of Missed Opportunities? First off, follow-up sounds like shit. Secondly, run your line like “If you have a partner who has your back,” BECAUSE THEY’RE BACK-TO-BACK IN THE FUCKING PICTURE. >_<
These guys really have problems with the word “if”.
If you’re gonna use sensei here, capitalize it because it’s being used in place of the person’s name like Father/Mother are.
Question mark, please.
You know, at least when Ayako’s translator for Softenni doesn’t know something, he’ll make it up (as he often does, with terrible results). This is lazy. At least lie to your audience about what it says so you can have some semblance of pride.
Promised Land, you mean. Capitalized.
Overall grade: C-
Not a very good release, guys. :(
This is one of the reason’s why I’ll just way for Ayako-Nishishi’s last 2 episodes. Or possibly Hiryuu’s as secondary.
How could you miss this gem?: http://i.imgur.com/6eeIX.jpg