This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.
Chibi gets it. She’s asked me to do this review like four times. So rather than reading some manga and falling asleep like I’d planned, I decided to do this review instead.
File size: 264 MB (LQ MKV), 475 MB (HQ MKV)
Japanesiness: Honorifics. Japanese name order. Muttsurini is kept as Muttsurini.
Karaoke. Kind of… obnoxious, which isn’t all that great of a trait in karaoke.
Typesetting. As a shitty editor myself, I don’t really bother editing typesetting… but for a show like this, you may wanna check out the lines before you paste them everywhere. I’m not really gonna call the fail that I saw out because I think errors in the actual script are more noticeable and relevant, but it’s something to keep in mind.
It’s been consistently localized as the River Styx throughout history, and even in your typesetting.
This isn’t one of the more egregious examples of what I’m about to talk about, but it is the point where I got fed up (2 minutes, 43 seconds in).
You don’t need ellipses in every fucking sentence. In fact, ellipses should be relatively rare. Every four lines in this release has an ellipsis. No, I’m not even fucking joking. There are 83 ellipses in this release, not counting the OP/ED/signs. There are 352 lines of dialogue. 83/352=way more than there fucking should be.
More like “They’ve probably got”
“about your feelings” is redundant. Drop it.
lol, nice English.
These words don’t match up at all. Choose improper or impure and stick with it.
Good gods, I have no clue what possesses people to do this. No, adding arbitrary amounts of exclamation marks does not make you a good editor, nor does it make your subs watchable. It just makes me think you’re an attention-deficit moron.
Perhaps you meant “you’re”.
~_~
Watchability: Watchable. You really don’t have time to overanalyze each line as the text comes in and out so quickly.
Overall grade: B
I’m far more inclined to be nicer with my critiques of scripts on this show. It’s an editing hell that I’m glad I don’t have to take part in. With all respect to this joint though, FFFpeeps put together a more competent release with what I saw of their episode 1. I’d still recommend FFFpeeps as the go-to group on this show.
There you go, Chibi. May I sleep now?
Meh… Their typesetting looks nice.
Nah, but the Typesetting is OK. I don’t have problems, except with some for be hard to read, but FFFpeeps have another signs unredeable. And Commie don’t translate some. I like more the typesetting of FFFpeeps, but Commie and Doki are ok at least.
Yes, you can sleep now. I’ll allow it. Though I don’t completely agree with everything that you’ve said, but that is my prerogative of course. :) First, I believe that ellipses are an editor’s friend, especially in the case of long pauses in lines where commas just don’t suffice (and there are a lot of awkward pauses in this show). Second, what’s with your hatred of past perfect tense, LOL? Every time I use it you poo all over it! I’ll take a B, but I think that we deserve better :P
Also, I assume that you’re talking about the exclamation marks in the “traitor” sentence and not the comma, considering that it’s exactly where it should be. I don’t remember putting all those exclamation marks, but perhaps I passed out in the middle of editing the sentence with my finger on the button. So for your glaring error within the review, I give it a B. How do you like them apples, sweetcheeks? (^3^)
I also thought that the comma in the ‘traitor’ sentence was appropriately placed… Though I’m not an English language major, so what do I know.
Oh, fuck. I miswrote that line. My problem was with the five exclamation marks. Sorry about that. Typed it up late at night.
Also, you don’t need to be an English major to know English. I certainly didn’t bother with that useless degree.
Seems like I only needed 14 ellipses. :3
Ellipses are… friends of a editor, but is…. a double-edged… sword, a excesive… use… is bad too (but, you can change some few… things in the lines, or simply put a comma). But the excesive… using in all lines, is simply… annoying… for the viewer, and exist…. some methods of timing… that can fix that, or simply…. by dividing a bit more the lines you can fix the match with… the time/audio. Or use a dot… if change the topic, etcetera…
That’s is a example of how annoying can be the excesive use of elipses. You must try to archive a balance with that.
“Ellipses
“Try to archive
Well, good night!
I edited your fixes in. Nyara deserves only the best. (^_~)b
This combo of bad English and ellipses is… madness.
Madness…? THIS… IS… SPARTA…!!!!!!!!!
This is a British colony.
British?
THIS. IS. AMERICAAAAAA!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTcVNuNX8yY
Grammatical is one thing; readable is another. How about “I doubt she’s already forgiven me”? Or, if you really want the perfect tense in there, “I doubt she’ll have already forgiven me” (though I think that’s either subjunctive or future perfect, not past perfect).
Though I don’t think the “about your feelings” line is redundant; I don’t know the context but I can only assume she means “you should be more honest about your feelings [for me]”, thus the phrase adds important information. If you think the line’s too long, maybe cut out the “with yourself”? :
On the subject of ellipses, I noticed I was using an awful lot this past week and even consciously cut some out; out of curiosity I counted and it comes out to 43 for KamiMemo 3 (out of about 450 lines). I guess they’re hard to avoid…
43 of 450 lines vs 83 of 350 lines
How about “I don’t think she’s forgiven me yet”?
Ellipsis are one of the most over-used tools in fansubbing. Guess it can’t be helped.
aegisub is one of the most over-used tools in fansubbing. ( ¬‿¬)
You need to look up what “overused” actually means. :p
You could get away with the line:
“They’ve probably something else in store for us”
at a stretch as:
“They have, probably, something else in store for us.”
though it’d be better as “The probably have something else in store for us.”
There are very few occasions where “got” actually works.