Fansub Review: [Stardust] Sengoku Paradise Kiwami (Episode 01)

I realized I can dramatically improve my review count by doing all these shitty, three-minute shows first. I have gg’s Senki and Shikkaku’s DxD halfway written, so I’ll do those after my mini-review marathon.

Fun fact: Stardust translated this from Spanish fansubs. That’s always a good decision, right?

Release format: MKV (42 MB, 8-bit), AVI (35 MB)

Japanesiness: No honorifics. Japanese name order.

Group website: http://stardustfansubs.wordpress.com/

Note: This show is only three minutes long.

8thsin’s translation critique: N/A

Ji-hi’s screenshot comparisons: N/A

 

Karaoke.

 

Opening (this anime has no ending, which is probably a good thing considering how shitty this song was). Karaoke was watchable but not good.

 

Typesetting.

 

If this was the worst typesetting in the release, I probably wouldn’t deem it necessary to have a post-birth abortion performed on the typesetter. Unfortunately…

Amazing.

I know you want to think they didn’t mux in the right fonts, but no… this is how they wanted it to display. After all, this typesetting is hardsubbed.

Sometimes I wonder if Japan ever looks at fansubs like this and thinks “No, those dirty foreigners don’t deserve Tales of Vesperia for the PS3.” You may claim there’s something wrong with my logic and that there’s no logical correlation between the two, but fuck you. I want Tales of Vesperia.

This is unreadable.

 

And here’s a nice little gallery of (some of) what they didn’t sub:

Not that I’d want them to try. We’ve all seen what happens when they do that.

 

Script.

I don’t usually pick on shitty comma splices, but when they’re this bad, I can’t resist.

“I’m fine! The lord has left me in charge, so I cannot falter!”

“I’m starving. Could you cook something?”

What

Stardust: Raping the English language one line at a time.

Wait, why did you…

… oh god. They think it’s acceptable to capitalize every Japanese word just because it’s Japanese… How does this still happen?

No, this is probably closer to the lines of “Masamune sure can cook!” or “I knew Masamune would come through!” I could fix the line like as it is, but it wouldn’t really fit. You can’t just Google translate each word in a line and then paste it back together. Literalfags only TL like this because they don’t know the languages they’re translating from/to.  (Note: My Japanese may be slightly off here, but my point is accurate.)

If you can read this, there’s an extra comma after “cooking”.

I don’t even want to get into fixing this. I’ve spent more time staring blankly at this line than the entire anime’s duration.

could != should

“That’s the end of today’s ‘little paradise’.” (Little Paradise may be capitalized if you wish)

Was that so hard?

I think you guys have a point. I should just stop thinking about this and get on with my life by burning your houses down.

 

Watchability: Unwatchable.

Overall grade: F

This is a shitty Japanese->Spanish->English translation. If any of you know much about the Spanish fansub scene, that’s not very good news.

People who can speak Spanish, just watch the original, shitty translation.

Everyone else, you’d be better served by watching the show raw.