This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.
Yes, kyonyuu, I’m late in making this post. Whateves. For the regular readers of this blog, I’m so sorry for the faggotry you’re about to witness.
So there’s this tourney that I’m participating called AniBlogTourney. It’s basically just blog circlejerking, so of course I’m interested in it.
Here are the matches and what I thought of the competitors. I encourage you to ignore forming your own opinions about these blogs and just mindlessly take whatever I say as fact. Shit gets easier that way. (Pics completely unrelated. Next Aniblog post won’t have such shitty formatting.)
Round 1
Match 1
http://toxicmuffin.wordpress.com/
Site type:
Shitty anime/manga opinions.
First impression:
Taking a look at the first article on the site, I get:
Disclaimer: Unlike my usual humble (read as low in self-esteem, occasionally self-loathing) self, I have attempted to inject myself with fake confidence for the sake of this post.
Stop right fucking there. Fuck your self-deprecating shit in a pathetic attempt to garner pity votes. Always go balls to the walls and never fucking regret it.
Sure, you probably suck at life, but on the internet, you have a shitty blog. That’s something to be proud of and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Article quality:
http://toxicmuffin.wordpress.com/2012/04/07/quick-impression-medaka-box/
This was one of the worst articles I ever read. Check out this piece-of-shit excerpt:
Dude with rad hair had a childhood friend. The childhood friend was perfect, and this perfection manifested itself in the size of her boobs. Using the power of boob bounce, and a few other martial art techniques like boob zoom in, Medaka seeks to solve all problems presented to her. She feels that as a bearer of large boobs (and the title of student council president), this is her sworn duty. Her friend, Zenkichi does not like being around her because he gets jealous; jealous because his boobs aren’t as big as hers and therefore, he is nowhere near as perfect.
I only needed that one paragraph to know I never want to visit this blog again.
http://8ths.in/
Site type:
Ramblings about translations and how everyone sucks at translating Japanese into English
First impression:
I visit this site every day.
Article quality:
This is pretty much what his articles are like. 8th generally writes in-depth analyses about the shows he’s subbing. I don’t know of any blogs out there with people that can match what he’s doing, simply because he analyzes the Japanese version rather than whatever translation the viewers get. Of course, you probably just visit for his TL reviews which are pretty cool in and of themselves.
Extra thoughts:
8th’s totally hiding his power levels. If he wanted, this dick-waving contest would be on gg/UTW/Saizen’s main page in short order.
Match 2
http://deremoe.com/
Site type:
Shitty anime opinions.
First impression:
Jesus Christ, just looking at this fucking shit. Looks like the admin here graduated from journalism school and upon finding no jobs, thought it prudent to make his site look like the shittiest newspaper he could dream up.
Motherfucker.
I’m trying to find an article to click on, but it’s fucking impossible.
Fuck it. I give up. Fuck this fucking site.
Article quality:
Didn’t even read that shit.
http://amaenboda.wordpress.com/
Site type:
Visual novel reviews.
First impression:
“This shit actually exists?”
Article quality:
There’s an XD or a ^^ in every fucking paragraph…
Just as you’d expect, the blog tries to be all deep about why they do or don’t like jerking off to anime bitches in a given game.
Extra thoughts:
VN otaku are probably the most hardcore otaku you’re gonna find. You don’t find many regular anime fans jerking it for hours into their sister’s panties as they read poorly written fan translations for D-tier VNs. The blog deserves respect for that at least.
Match 3
http://www.shamefulotakusecret.com/
Site type:
Shitty anime opinions.
First impression:
What is it? It’s an anime blog. A blog about anime (literally, “pornographic cartoons from Japan”).
That was their description. Fuckin’ sold.
Article quality:
http://www.shamefulotakusecret.com/2011/02/20/2678/
This isn’t even a fucking article. You have one more chance.
http://www.shamefulotakusecret.com/2012/03/29/deep/
…All right. You pass. But I’m watching you…
http://onewdesign.wordpress.com/
Site type:
Shitty anime opinions.
First impression:
They’re really taking this Aniblog shit seriously.
Article quality:
http://onewdesign.wordpress.com/2012/03/31/observing-a-nostalgic-elegy-for-winter/
With every line I read, I felt my wrists getting limper. Keep your poetry to your seventh-grade writing class, kthx.
Match 4
http://otakulife-animereview.blogspot.com/
Site type:
Shitty anime opinions.
First impression:
Holy fuck that banner is huge.
Article quality:
http://otakulife-animereview.blogspot.com/2012/02/b-is-for-ben-to.html
She gave Ben-to a 5/10. Shit taste confirmed.
http://considerthem.wordpress.com/
Site type:
Shitty anime opinions.
First impression:
I’m in the fourth poll, up against Otaku Life: Anime Review. Since of course I would like to win (not gonna happen)
Stop whining, you stupid bitch. Ovary up.
Article quality:
http://considerthem.wordpress.com/2012/04/13/friday-eyes/
She dedicated an entire post to eyes she took out of anime pics. Who does that?
Someone who has earned my respect, that’s who.
tl;dr: Vote for the bolded ones:
toxicmuffin vs. 8thsin
daremoe vs. ama-something
shamefulotakusecrets vs. onewdesign
otakulife vs. considerthem
http://aniblogtourney.wordpress.com/2012/04/15/round-1-matches-1-4/
You took money for writing this article.
umad?
The only non-shit blog in this trainwreck of a tournament is 8th’s.
And whiners.fucking.pro, that’s who.
Another reason to not vote for toxicmuffin: He watched the Subdesu version of Medaka Box.
;_;
If it makes you feel any better, I used Whine subs for one of my posts.
You might have already seen this but…
http://www.ji-hi.net/sp12/medaka/
The screenshots speak for themselves. you really shouldn’t base any conception you may have about the anime using Subdesu subs. Just saying you cannot hope to produce intellectual discussion in parts of your blog when some of your views are ill-founded as such. The More You Know, etc., etc.
please review, http://tenka.seiha.org
:p
What, review you three rounds before you compete? Nah. I can give you a quick impression, though.
Your thoughts are amusing but wasted on the “let me write two paragraphs about the episode I just saw and then onto the next one!” standard that most blogs in the tournament seem to follow. I’d like to see what happened if you tried for something different than the same ol’ posts.
A blurb at best and 96 pictures? You pretty much fail no matter who you are up against.
Write something, grab pics on the topic and add in pics of things that you found cute, funny, disturbing, whatever. You are not RandomC
Wah, I am mentioned on Whiners-Pro. I feel so honored!
Well, I didn’t intend the self-loathing to be pity votes per say. I just didn’t want people to end up thinking I was arrogant.
But the rest of the post however, was all for the sake of pity votes. It is a pity that people who are pro at WHINING can’t pity other people’s whining.
But seriously, thanks for telling me to be proud. That made me happy for some reason.
Sorry about the shitty articles. I will do my best to improve!
Oh for sure. even if all he had done was make a post on his own blog, I’d have lost 90:10. Also, sweetie, you missed out the part about him being one classy,ass motherfucker. Seriously, the dude just oozes class.
>>>But seriously, thanks for telling me to be proud. That made me happy for some reason.
>>>Sorry about the shitty articles. I will do my best to improve!
I almost cried after reading this
http://i.imgur.com/eEThO.png
Yeah, I be butthurt, bro.
whiners vs angryanimebitches vs gargarstegosaurus
this will be funny tourney
got 22/4/12 marked in your calendar just like me, now do ya?
Srs bsns, this tournament. You said what needed to be said, Dark_Sage.
The only problem with 8thsin is his paranoia. But again, like all review sites whether it’s fansubbing or anything else, they should be taken by a pinch of salt. Because ultimately, the descision is yours at the end.
I’m neither an anime fan nor do I jerk off to anime bitches. I jerk off to visual novel bitches. I don’t read translations either, I play them in full Japanese glory.
And those articles with XD and ^^ are one of the few ones written by Aero, not me.
But otherwise, accurate enough descriptions.
Those bitches are the worst. Except for the bitches in Biniku. Cuz those bitches are in full .gif glory.
Oh, that poetry was like totally ironic and shit. Our entire participation in this tourney is ironic. In fact, we’re not even hipsters. That’s the ironic part of this.
p.s. I think this entire article is ironic. Only ironically, of course. The ironic thing is that I’m not ironic unless I try to be ironic, and ironically, when I try to be ironic, I’m straightforward.
B(
I enjoy those that are coming in to defend themselves.
8thsin vs Whiners final? I think so.
Someone should review moesucks. Shit is entertaining.
It’s just another “I review anime episodes” blog like every single blog in the tourney. E Minor can write well, that’s for sure. But I noticed after four posts that there were two months where absolutely nothing happens. Sorry, but I’m not interested in reading anime reviews in general, let alone ones from a site that can’t manage to make more than a handful of posts in three months.
“8th’s totally hiding his power levels. If he wanted, this dick-waving contest would be on gg/UTW/Saizen’s main page in short order.”
Actually, that might be a good idea if he wants to take down psgels, or at least put a dent in his vote in the upcoming group match on May 15th.
I don’t even know why people care about this competition at all. It exists purely for its own sake and will prove nothing other than whoever can spam “vote for my blog” to as many people as possible.
Whatever’s fun, I guess.
That’s the thing. We’re all having fun with it. It’s not supposed to “prove” anything.
There are tangible benefits to the blogs and readers, though. Would you have any reason to check them out if this tourney didn’t exist? Probably not. Chances are, someone out there has writing that you’d enjoy, though. This is a great way to find out if that’s the case because you know as well as I do that you aren’t searching to the 200th page on google for “anime blog”.
If you’re still not interested in it at all, that’s fine. I’ll try to keep the Aniblog stuff to a rate of maybe 1 post every couple days. But I find value in it and I think others will too.
Okay. Any more reviews on their way? The queue page seems to be broken.
The queue is down because I can’t figure out how to enable comments on Pages anymore. There’s no point in the queue if people can’t talk.
And yeah, I have a review coming up in like 30 mins if I can stop looking at these blogs…
8thsin wins by a landslide. Nuff said.
Also, ColonyDrop. And Koji Oe.
http://moritheil.files.wordpress.com/2011/11/kojioe_friends.png?w=470
I’m inclined to agree.
Can’t be helped if China solved our population crisis 5000 years ago by sending us 500 virgin men and women. Maybe if they did it again…
Would the otaku know what to do with 500 virgin women?
If you wanted a visual novel review site you should have taken
http://omochikaeri.wordpress.com/2012/03/01/march-2012-eroge-releases/. Most people don’t even fap to visual novels but just like the plot.
http://omochikaeri.wordpress.com/
Visual novels include porn scenes because they don’t sell very well otherwise, so… yes, people who fap to them make up a big enough chunk of the market that they need to be catered to.