CTSS’s review is canceled since they hardly even edited it. Which means I only have to do Oyatsu’s. Hell yeah, I’m getting through this season quickly!

…except now I have to review the HorribleSubs version, since Oyatsu did an original TL. Dammit, world, why must you keep me down?

Table of Contents

Release Information

Visual Quality

Script Quality

Results

Release Information

Episode details.

Release format: MKV (313 MB, 10-bit)

Japanesiness: Honorifics.

English style: British English, mostly.

Encoding details: http://pastebin.com/TWYNhFni

Speed: Slow (>48 hours)

 

External links.

Group website: http://oyatsu.fansub.co/

IRC channel: #[email protected]

Fansub.co screenshot comparisons: N/A

Subbusu screenshot comparisons: N/A

 

Visual Review

Karaoke.

Opening. Oyatsu, why does your karaoke have dandruff? The colors work, but you really overdid it on the effect, and not in a good way.

Note that you can turn the effect off, which makes it a LOT better, but unfortunately for Oyatsu I review the default options.

Rating: Okay-.

 

Insert. They took what they were doing with the OP and did it without retardation this time. So yes, it’s fine. I wish the colors matched the chicks, though, as this just seems lazy.

Rating: Okay+.

 

Ending. The positioning made sense. Standard white won’t any sagey accolades, but it fit the ED well.

Rating: Okay+.

 

 

Typesetting.

Monster Hunter, is that you?

If you’re wondering what’s going on, Oyatsu tried to match the “gibberish font into actual font” switch that the Japanese did. But I didn’t really like either of the ways they went about it.

Why not just copy what the Japanese did? Take cues from the groups who subbed Gargantia.

 

 

 

Script Review

Karaoke.

OP

What a clusterfuck. I think what they were trying to get across is the singer’s repressed desires stir her heart and that rouses her to speak (or act).

Unfortunately, to get to that point of understanding the line (if that’s even what the Japanese lyrics were trying to get across), I had to read this line like 5 times. Not because this was a deep, cleverly written line, but because it was phrased with all the grace of a one-legged tap dancer.

The huh?

If you haven’t guessed by now, pretty much the entirety of the OP is poorly written to the point it reads like gibberish.

And the OP also has random lines bounded by quotation marks. I couldn’t find any logic in it.

What in the shit is “the hope for love itself”?

Listen Oyatsu, I get that songs are hard to translate. I do. But when every line defies logic/sensibility, you may need to take a step back and figure what exactly it is you want to convey.

This OP translation sucks. You can do better.

 

 Insert

I… are these supposed to match?

You mean “covered with open wounds” or something. Get the imagery right, please.

The subject of this thought is “your love”.

?

Maybe you should have had your fucking editor edit the songs, Oyatsu. Know how I can tell he didn’t? He doesn’t put apostrophes after the “O” and he spells “defense” as “defence”. Yes, I do pay attention to these things, and it shows in the poor quality of what you’ve burdened your viewers with.

And considering one of the central plots of the show is that Syrup is trying to form an “Aquafall Defence Force”, I must question your “This aqua-colored planet is your absolute defense” translation. Did the song TL even watch the show?

 

 

Main Script.

“by the sea” is more commonly referred to in humanspeak as “at the beach”.

Full convo:

What is that thing?
It’s a lucasite.
Lucasite?
They come from meteorites and release tons of triph.
Its intention is to destroy the world— to destroy Aquafall.

Its intention -> Their goal

Match that shit properly, please.

Not counting this as an issue in my secret, patented scorerizer system that is apparently so arbitrary people can’t figure out how the hell I come up with my scores even though people constantly saying things like “This reads like a B, but you gave it a B-, what gives?”, but you’re gonna want to use “Whoa” here.

Whoa: Oh my fucking Jesus God, you’re blowing my mind

Woah: Something you say to a horse or a fansubber

No. >:o

Come on, Aegisub even told you it was wrong when you wrote it. Did you think you were smarter than a program or something? Cuz you’re not.

For those wondering, it’s actually “vengeance”. Go spelling!

This was quite confusing in Oyatsu’s release since the lines are written in a way that indicates they’re being said by the same person, when they’re not (and when the complete thought would be gibberish even if they were).

CR:

SYROP: Listen, I understand you’re depressed, but…
JORM: That spear must have been important.

…and it’s also confusing in Crunchyroll’s. Neither line really makes it clear who’s talking or what their intent is. Try this:

>I understand you’re upset about losing your lance, but–

>That spear must have been important to Leviathan.

That makes it absolutely clear there’s a break between the two people and doesn’t read like a bundle of dumb.

 

 

Results

Watchability: Watchable.

Visual grade: B-

Script grade: B-

Overall grade: B-

If only someone competent handled the songs, you guys would be doing a lot better. Too bad I’m not gonna ignore what amounts to 15% of this 180-line show, though. (For those of you who don’t keep track of line counts, that means this script is the easiest goddamn thing an editor could ever be handed; most shows are 300-500 lines.)
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