2. I split the Party into two parts — Essential and Extended. Assuming you want to get this shit over with quickly, just go with the Essential choices. I picked these to be the most representative lines in the releases. But if you’re one of those people who want more comparisons to help you come to a decision, go with the Essential choices and the Extended ones.

3. If you didn’t like any of the lines, choose the “N/A” option. The results for “N/A” won’t be automatically tabulated, so you’ll have to do the math in your head. Have my gomens and nasais.

4. A “>” indicates that another character has begun speaking. If there are three characters in a line comparison, I will indicate the third with a “>>” and so on for more characters.

5. Group order is randomized for each screenshot, every time you refresh the page. However, the “N/A” option will always appear at the bottom of the screen.

6. Your results will be summed up when you click the “Get your results” button. Feel free to vote in the poll at the end/post in the comments to let others know how you did and to compare your results with them.

7. Party hard.

Essential 1.

Rias offering herself to Issei and Issei not carpe-ing the shit out of her diems.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD01.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 01

Commie :: I’ll do whatever you want if it makes you happy.
>”I’ll do whatever you want?!”
>I never knew mere words could be this bonerific!

FFF :: I’ll do anything you want.
>Anything I want?!
>I-I’ve never heard words quite so powerful!

SubDESU :: If that makes you happy,
then I’m willing to do anything.
>She’s willing to do anything?!
>I-Is there such an expression in our language?

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 2.

Issei’s pals talking about the rumors being spread about him.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD02.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 02

Commie :: There’re some weird rumors floating around about you, so you’d best be careful.
>Rumors?
They say Hyoudou Issei’s been jumping from one pretty girl to the next
and committing all kinds of atrocities!

FFF :: I’ve heard some sketchy rumors floating about, so you’d better watch out.
>Rumors?
Rumors of Hyodo Issei taking girl after girl
and doing {\i1}all sorts{\i0} of evil!

SubDESU :: There seems to be a weird rumor going around so you’d better be careful.
>Rumors?
That you have been flippin’ and switchin’ beautiful girls around and doing all kinds of mischief.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 3.

More rumor talk.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD03.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 03

Commie :: That you’ve gotten hold of Rias and Himejima’s secrets
and are using those to force them into doing all kinds of lewd things!
>>And that you’ve bared your poisonous fangs at this school’s mascot, Toujou Koneko,
>>and are devouring that immature body like a beast!

FFF :: By threatening Rias-senpai and Himejima-senpai with something,
you do the most lewd and gut-wrenching of sexual acts with them!
>Wha–
>>Your bloodstained hands do not hesitate to stretch to Tojo Koneko-chan, mascot of the academy,
>>and you devour her underdeveloped body like a beast devours its prey!

SubDESU :: You know Rias-senpai and Himejima-senpai’s secrets,
and have been using them to force them to do brutish sexual play’s!
>>And on a worse note,
>>the school’s famed mascot, Toujo Koneko-chan also included,
>>you’ve also lusted after her body to do a beastly sex play with her!

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 4.

Hag-chan is confused.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD04.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 04

Commie :: You’re having a Karuta Research Society meeting, right?
>My god, are you deaf?

FFF :: You’re having a Karuta club meeting, aren’t you?
>Now {\i1}that’s{\i0} one mistake I haven’t heard before.

SubDESU :: Your karuta club’s meeting is here today, right?
>{\an8}TL Note: Occult okaruto and the karuta card game sounds the same.
>She totally misheard it at a weird angle.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 5.

Issei meeting up with Mister Cool.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD05.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 05

Commie :: He looks like a foreigner.
Wonder what he does for a living.
>Let’s get this party started.
I’m underage, you see.

FFF :: He doesn’t look Japanese.
I wonder what his job is.
>Have a drink.
Sorry, I’m underage.

SubDESU :: He looks like a foreigner, but…
I wonder what he’s really up to.
>Just chug up.
Sorry, I’m still underage.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 6.

In the name of the moon, she will punish you~

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD06.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 06

Commie :: Infidels who run away from their masters
and go on a rampage just to satisfy their own desires
deserve to be sentenced to death.
In the name of Lord Gremory,
I will destroy you!

FFF :: A disobedient creature, who leaves its master and pursues its own desires.
Such a sin deserves severe punishment.
In the name of Lord Gremory,
I shall punish you!

SubDESU :: You, insubordinate scum who escaped your master and is on a rampage to fullfill your own desires.
Your unforgivable sins shall be adequately punished.
In the name of the Gremory household,
I shall eliminate you!

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 7.

Issei confessing his love to Yuuto and being rejected.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD07.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 07

Commie :: I’m just worried!
>Worried?
>Why?
>Demons are supposed to be self-centered.
What are you even on about?
>Though, well, I do think I was in the wrong today.

FFF :: I’m {\i1}worried{\i0}!
>Worried?
>About who?
>Devils are naturally self-centered beings.
Dude…
Are you kidding?
>Nevertheless, I’m sorry for what I just did.

SubDESU :: I’m worried about you!
>Worried?
>To whom and why are you worried?
>Demons are fundamentally selfish beings, you know.
What in the world are you talking about?
>Anyway, I’m sorry for what happened earlier.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 8.

A convenient plot point comes out of nowhere.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD08.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 08

Commie :: I remember now!
I visited the church a bunch of times because this kid’s family invited me.
>So that’s how it was.
>Now I get why the demons previously assigned here had all been eliminated.

FFF :: I remember now!
I went to church with this kid’s family a few times.
>I see.
>Now I know why the previous landlord disappeared.

SubDESU :: I remember now!
I was invited by this girl’s family
and went to church several times.
>So that’s how it is.
>Now I know why our predecessors were wiped out here.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 9.

Two demons/angels/arch-demonangels/fuck-if-I-know conversing in the church or wherever the hell it is.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD09.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 09

Commie :: This place sure has fallen into ruin.
>I heard that a demon and a fallen angel went nuts around here.

FFF :: It’s quite run-down.
>I’ve heard that a Devil and a Fallen Angel had something…

SubDESU :: It’s really broken down now.
>I heard that a stand off between fallen angels and demons took place here previously.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 10.

Aww yeah, shit’s about to go down.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxD10.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW 10

Commie :: Won’t ya let me try a li’l experiment while I repay ya for last time?
Let’s find out which one’s stronger!
Yer shitty cursed sword,
or this holy sword.
Excalibuuur!
Yer dead!
>I will not stand for Excalibur.

FFF :: I’d like to test something out to return your favor.
I want to compare your piece-of-shit Demonic Sword
with my Holy Sword,
Excalibur!
>I will never forgive Excalibur.

SubDESU :: Won’t you let me test this thing out while I get back at you for last time?
I wonder which one is stronger.
Your shitty demon blade, or my holy sword Excalibur?!
>I will never forgive the Excalibur.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Decision Point:

Jesus Christ, these people lived long enough to fansub this show? Darwin was wrong. Darwin was so, so wrong. (It’s time for a strategic retreat. Head down to the results.)
Oh my god, this shit is so pathetically hilarious. More failure please. (A sadist after my own heart. Please continue partying.)

Expanded 1.

Rias grinding on Issei.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE01.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E01

Commie :: So, could you tell me what’s going on?
>I’m sorry.
>I let myself in since you were already asleep.
No, that’s not what I mean…
>I felt like going to sleep with you in my arms.
Oh, you felt like it, huh?

FFF :: C-Care to explain what’s going on?
>I’m sorry.
>I saw that you were sleeping,
so I decided to join in.
No, that’s fine, but…
>I felt like using you as my body pillow.
You felt like it, huh?

SubDESU :: What exactly is happening here?
>Forgive me.
>You were still deeply asleep so I just came in.
No, I wasn’t asking about that…
>I felt like making you my hugging pillow.
I see, so you “felt” huh?

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 2.

Rias so alpha. Issei so not.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE02.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E02

Commie :: We still have plenty of time.
I guess I could indulge in some lewd {\i1}bonding{\i0} with my cute little servant.

FFF :: We still have some time.
I suppose I could use this time to {\i1}bond{\i0} with my slave.

SubDESU :: We still have some time left.
Shall we treat this as our affectionate master and slave communication session?

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 3.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE03.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E03

Commie :: We didn’t limit it to just the girls.
We even spread rumors about you and Kiba being gay.
>Apparently, a few girls love it!
>>Screw you guys!

FFF :: The rumor isn’t just about the girls.
There’s also a rumor that you’re gay with Kiba!
>I heard that some of the girls love it.
>>You assholes!

SubDESU :: We didn’t just include the girls,
because we also spread rumors about you and Kiba going all homo with each other.
>It seems to be pretty popular with a certain group of girls.
>>Stop fucking around!

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 4.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE04.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E04

Commie :: Are the three stooges letting their libidos go wild because of a perverted conversation?
>>Kiryuu Aika.
There are plenty of better fish out in the sea, Asia.
You don’t need to go out with {\i1}this.{\i0}

FFF :: More perv talk from the Three Horny Stooges?
>Kiryuu?
>>Aika?
Asia, there are plenty of guys out there.
Why’d you have to choose {\i1}this{\i0} one to be your boyfriend?

SubDESU :: You three idiots having sex talks with your boners?
>>Kiryuu Aika.
Asia, there are lots of other better guys around.
You don’t need to make this one your boyfriend.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 5.

Innuendos.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE05.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E05

Commie :: The two of you are {\i1}so{\i0} clingy.
You totally look like a couple that’s docking every night.

FFF :: You two are stuck together all the time.
People wouldn’t be surprised if you two were {\i1}connecting{\i0} every night.

SubDESU :: You two were always so close and cuddly,
so it only seemed like you two were a couple that always “unites as one” every night.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 6.

Jesus Christ, Japanese dialogue is so shit. Are their lives really so fucking dull they can only spew out this insipid shit, or is it just anime?

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE06.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E06

Commie :: During that battle with Phenex…
>Phenex?
You kept standing up, no matter how many times he knocked you down.
That was so manly of you.
Not to mention, you crashed the engagement party to save the president.
And you managed to save her by defeating Phenex, who was considered immortal at the time.

FFF :: During the battle with Phoenix…
>Phoenix?
No matter how many times you were beaten, you stood back up.
You were very heroic.
Then, you raided the President’s engagement party to save her,
and even defeated the so-called immortal Phoenix to do so.

SubDESU :: That last fight with Phenix…
>Phenix?
That form of yours that continued to stand up again no matter how many times you fell,
was really manly.
Then you broke into that party to save Prez.
And also, eventually defeated the so-called immortal Phenix.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 7.

Top of the charts.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE07.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E07

Commie :: If you don’t do your best at forming more contracts,
you’ll keep falling further behind in your quest to become an upper-class demon.
>I know, {\i1}I know!{\i0}
>I’ll be numero uno next month for sure!

FFF :: You need to get those contracts made,
or you’ll never become a High Class Devil.
>I know!
>I’ll make it to the top of the group next month!

SubDESU :: If you don’t work hard to get contracts
your path leading to becoming a high level demon will get even farther.
>I understand.
>I’ll try to aim for the best next month!

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 8.

Top-tier hilarity from the land of the rising sun.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE08.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E08

Commie :: This is the naked truth behind Issei’s past…
>And this is from when he was in kindergarten.
>He was already such a skirt-chaser back then!
>>Fuck my life.

FFF :: Issei-senpai’s embarrassing history…
>This was back in kindergarten.
>He was already going after girls’ butts.
>>Just great.

SubDESU :: These are Issei-senpai’s perverted buddies.
>This one was when he was in kindergarten.
>He’s always been chasing after girl’s butts.
>>This is the worst.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 9.

In the first season Issei got a lot of shit for not magically teleporting to whatever place people were summoning him too.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE09.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E09

Commie :: This the place?
I’m sure it’s gonna be the same old “What kinda demon has to ring a doorbell?!” shtick again.

FFF :: Here we go.
This person’s probably gonna wonder why a Devil would ring the doorbell, too.

SubDESU :: It’s here.
Maybe they’ll say again,
“there’s no demon that arrives by pressing the doorbell!”.

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 10.

Probably shouldn’t have gotten into that conversation, Issei.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/DxDE10.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Highschool DxD NEW E10

Commie :: Your magic’s too weak,
so you use a bike to go meet the human who summoned you?
>Well, yeah.
That’s classic!

FFF :: You biked to your summoner because you didn’t have enough power?
>Yeah…
What a guy!

SubDESU :: So you come to those who summon you via bicycle because your own magic power is too weak?
>Well, yes.
Now that is really something!

N/A :: N/A. They all suck.