Ohayocon Thursday-Friday write-up next tonight. If I don’t fall asleep during it, that is.
Table of Contents
Release Information
Episode details.
Release format: MKV (308 MB, 10-bit), LQ AVI (192 MB)
Japanesiness: Honorifics. The script is also rather in line with what you’d expect from Hatsuyuki. Translations err on the side of familiarity and the phrasing is notably conservative.
English style: American English.
Encoding details: http://pastebin.com/zEfzjS2h
Speed: Slow (>48 hours)
Translation style: Original TL.
Note: Karaoke is hardsubbed, as Hatsuyuki karaoke tends to be.
External links.
Group website: http://hatsuyuki-fansubs.com/
IRC channel: #[email protected]
Visual Review
Karaoke.
Opening. Hatsuyuki went an interesting route here. While the bottom text is static and matches the karaoke, the top line shifts color similar to opening/ending/middle sequences of the OP. But interesting doesn’t mean good, and I found the color changes distracting and unnecessary.
While we’re on the karaoke part, the English in both screens here is wrong. The comma shouldn’t be in the first one, and the second should just be “dimly lit”, since adverbs that end in -ly don’t require hyphenation to be compound adjectives (don’t ask why; it’s a stupid rule). The -ly thing comes up in the release proper too.
Rating: Okay.
Insert transformation rap not subbed. Not that I expected it to be.
Ending. Lines come in with a heavy downpour of snow and then fade away with snow particles. Cute stuff.
While I think the amount of snow covering the text was a bit much, everything else was tasteful and fit the theme of the ED.
Rating: Good.
Typesetting.
Hatsuyuki threw a lot into these typesets. Fades were appropriately handled and the colors/fonts were solid matches.
The fuck is up with “Cafe Restaurant Most”, though? That’s the kind of name that you’d expect to come from a kid with Down’s.
Other.
A bunch of different-colored Ayakashi are talking here, so Hatsuyuki switched up the colors in the lines. You may need to look into this screen a bit to see what I’m talking about, but it’s definitely noticeable in the release.
Script Review
Main Script.
The hip and rad slang these days is “lame”, not “uncool”.
That logic doesn’t follow. Since he’s dissing Nora-kun, might as well make him more teen edgy.
“How about I make you tea when you get us off the streets?”
The below line looks much nicer when combined with that.
While I don’t actually have a problem with the terminology you used here, I do think you meant “demand” instead of “command”.
?
“This is extortion.”
Awkward phrasing is a hallmark of this release. Hell, I can hardly even handle reading this line. It’s more disgusting than sleeping on used maxi pads and far less sexy.
everyday -> every day
“everyday” is an adjective, so unless you’re trying to describe that comma, it’s wrong.
Am I supposed to understand what this is saying? Because I don’t.
You asking for his Facebook status or something? What is this?
that -> he
Please. You even have “who” in that line.
“You’ve reached Delivery God Yato! Fast, cheap, safe, and at your service!”
He’s trying to sell himself harder than an old prostitute here. Put a little oomph into it.
So many swings, so many misses.
“So what do you want?!”
Capitalizing words after commas… Funimation, is that you?
Fucking hell, are you really that new to English? Be more specific.
cut off/cut down.
Starting a sentence in lowercase is not generally the best way to succeed at English.
And he’s going to “crush all evil and purify all manner of evil”? Try learning how to write, shitbags.
Yuck. No.
If you’ve got the time to bitch about how this line sucks in your script comments (you’re damn right I read that shit), you’ve got enough time to fix the issue. There are two unknowns here: these guys and them. The only one that’s explicitly answered (“these guys”) takes one minute to be fully explained, leaving the viewer to have to fill in the blanks for the other unknown way after they’ve read the line.
Don’t do that. Fuck.
Hey editor-kun, you know what they call a “quiz question” in English? This is a tricky one, so I challenge you to stretch your mind before coming up with the answer.
Answer:
Results
Watchability: Watchable.
Visual grade: A-
Script grade: C-
Overall grade: C
FFF is still the group to beat for Noragami. No reason to wait for Hatsu.
One review left with Sekinin, but t4w is being t4w, so it might be a while till I get to it.
That’s the kind of name that you’d expect to come from a kid with Down’s.
Japan has the best naming sense, didn’t you know?
It’s a reference to Cafe Restaurant Gusto (see http://www.skylark.co.jp/gusto/index.html ), which is like Japanese TGI Friday’s. It’s acceptable in the same way “Moonbucks” or “Gaggle” is, I guess.
That actually clears some things up. Damn, Japan is weird.
He’s trying to sell himself harder than an old prostitute here. Put a little oomph into it. – Maybe they are used to call old prostitutes and gradually they learned it from them.
And he’s going to “crush all evil and purify all manner of evil”? Try learning how to write, shitbags.
and annihilate all which is evil from this world?
doesn’t it sound better?
btw: Not native, so spare me if I’m wrong ;)
I think his issue was that you can’t purify all evil if you’re going to crush it. They’re mutually exclusive actions.
I don’t particularly care what verbiage they want to use for that line. It’s just that doubling up on the “evil” is a really bad idea. I don’t see why they let the line go as-is.
>One review left with Sekinin, but t4w is being t4w, so it might be a while till I get to it.
Sekinin actually hasn’t released a Noragami (or anything for that matter) since episode 1.
Right. They’re stalled. But t4w said they hadn’t dropped it, so I’m gonna take his word for it.
LMAO at that last spoiler. Man, that was just crazy!
Someone got zinged, ouch.