This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.
The worst part about being an anime fan is the anime.
Not Fucking Watching/10
Here’s a list, and that’s about all the thought I’ve given to it:
- YuruYuri S3
- Garo – The Crimson Moon
- Haikyuu!! S2
- Owarimonogatari
- Shinmai Maou no Testament Burst
- Hidan no Aria
- DD Hokuto no Ken 2 – Ichigo Aji+
- Cardfight!! Vanguard G GIRS Crisis
- Gochuumon wa Usagi Desu Ka S2
Dropped/10
High School Star Musical
This isn’t a musical at all. I want my money back.
Rakudai Kishi no Cavalry (Chivalry of a Failed Knight)
Brave Beats
It’s an an anime about dancing.
Bad/10
Shomin Sample
Some rich girls kidnap an “average guy” and then… dammit, I’m sorry, I can’t even get through a description of this shitshow without scraping around for that exacto knife I picked up at Hot Topic.
Fuck it, I’m gonna drop this too. There ain’t enough time in a life for anime this bad.
Taimadou Gakuen 35 Shiken Shoutai (AntiMagic Academy 35th Test Platoon )
Good character designs don’t excuse more of the blue-ball pacifism that infests nearly every shounen to come out of Japan since they realized people were stupid enough to like Rurouni Kenshin.
Turning what started out as an interesting character into another slack-jawed harem candidate doesn’t help things either. You don’t need to be a SJW to want characters that provide more than window dressing to limp-wristed MCs.
Concrete Revolutio
If Mekakucity Actors and The Rolling Girls had a kid, this would be the discarded afterbirth that somehow mutated into a full-fledged show of its own.
Concrete Revolutio is probably the only anime this season I will definitely not drop no matter how much I end up hating it — and I know I’ll hate it a lot. I ain’t a masochist; I just sure as hell can appreciate a good narrative villain.
Meh/10
Shingeki! Kyojin Chuugakkou (Attack on Titan Junior High)
“Attack on Titan, but everyone’s chibi and in middle school” is the kinda joke you’d bandy around with your buddies for an hour or two after a couple drinks. But it gets much less funny when there’s real time put into it. 3-minute episodes would be tolerable, but a series of 12 17-minute videos? Eh…
Owari no Seraph S2 (Seraph of the End S2)
The first season sucked and the second does too. But I guess it definitively answered the question of “Will fujoshi watch something just cuz it has pretty boys in it?”
Noragami Aragoto
I just finished up a marathon of the first season, so I’m prepared to say this is gonna be 100% better since we don’t have to deal with another 6-episode marathon of Yukine being a whiny shitbag.
And it only comes at the cost of watering down Bishamon’s character like it was that fucking tap-water-and-cola “Long Island” I had at AMC last week. What a bargain.
Dance With Devils
It’s like Diabolik Lovers, but with less rape, better incest, and a cooler outfit for the MC. So yeah, it’s still mediocre, but at least it ain’t setting the human race back a century.
Comet Lucifer
Don’t take Comet Lucifer’s placement in the meh section to be a heavy knock against the show. Rather, the first episode consisted of so much setup that it’s impossible to tell if the payoff’s gonna be worth it just yet.
I am actually gonna be a bit bullish on this one and say that it may end up being one of my favorites this season. Give me an episode or two before you ask me why, cuz I don’t want this to end up being another Galilei Donna situation.
Gakusen Toshi Asterisk (The Asterisk War: The Academy City on the Water)
The only thing that makes Gakusen better than Gakuen is… uh… I dunno, I guess I just like it more.
Heavy Object
Gentlemen, I like war. And onee-sans. God, if only the show had something happen in the first episode, I could rate this higher. Japan, plz. I need my lung cancer.
Mobile Suit Gundam – Iron-Blooded Orphans
It’s a Gundam that doesn’t have 00 in the subtitle, so yeah, it’s probably gonna suck. Just hasn’t given me a reason to take much of a stance on it yet. ~_~
Osomatsu-san
The entire first episode was spent pissing all over common tropes & popular anime. While that was enough to moderately impress me, I am quite worried that this series won’t have much to go on in subsequent episodes. Please, prove me wrong, Japan.
K – Return of Kings
It’s K.
Young Black Jack
Though YBJ is objectively trash, its formulaity is somewhat comforting. It’s basically the junk food of anime.
Top 5 6
6. One-Punch Man
OPM is the kinda anime that likely came straight out of a writing seminar prompt. Still, everything in the show is so intelligently taut that you can almost forget you’re watching a show where the premise is “a guy punches things once and they die”.
My nearest comparison for OPM is the manga version of Prison School — you don’t think think the series could last too long with a plot so banal, but then you realize you never watched shit for the story anyway.
That’s why Dai Sato is stuck writing the scripts for Gyrozetter, Kaitou Joker, and fucking Battle Spirits instead of another Ergo Proxy. You monster.
5. Utawarerumono – Itsuwari no Kamen (Utawarerumono – The False Faces)
What can I say? I’m into tail.
4. Subete ga F ni Naru (The Perfect Insider)
I’ll give Subete points for creating dialogue that could elicit a glare from me. And it earns even more points for having a heavy veneer of grimness covering the whole drawn-out shebang. That all adds up to about 8 out of 10, which is where I think the show will end up settling anyway.
A more critical person might have this around a 6, but pretentious garbage is sorta my wheelhouse, so~
3. Sakurako-san no Ashimoto ni wa Shitai ga Umatteiru (Beautiful Bones)
If this image doesn’t necessitate you finding a towel, you’re too casual to be swayed by my words anyway.
2. Lance N’ Masques
I’m too tired to figure out why I like this show, but if “it’s cute” cuts it for you, we’ll go with that.
1. Valkyrie Drive ~Mermaid~
This show is legitimately fantastic, not only for its social consciousness regarding sexuality, but also for its insightful examination & critique of traditional power structures. Females are the sole focus of the series, and the means by which they advance their agenda — through their own pleasure — is a masterfully positioned middle finger toward every series where the female characters exist solely as tools to be used.
Hate if you want, but I’d like to think I’m advancing the feminist cause with every stroke. And yes, I do legitimately have this as 10/10.
~~~
Guess this is where I’ll throw the rating table in coming posts if I can even be bothered. I have issues with following through on anything but my golf swing. And also my golf swing.
I’m glad I’m not the only person who genuinely seems to like Lance N’ Masques. The soundtrack is killer.
“OPM”
“Lance N’Masques”
“Valkyrie Drive”
“Top 6”
Wat?
They’re very good animes for very good people. I don’t know what else to tell ya.
Such a taste. As expected from Dark_Sage. *laugh madly*
>A more critical person might have this around a 6, but pretentious garbage is sorta my wheelhouse, so~
Fuck, you’re making my ovaries squirt harder than an AV actress’ ona scene. Stay classy, DS.
No love for Concrete Revolutio? Narrative’s interesting, for what it’s worth; might end up flopping like Punchline did, though.
The pacing is fucked.
Too fast? It’s comprehensive enough. I’m more worried for content if anything else.
Too jerky. It moves from scene to scene with little cohesion or purpose. I’m fine with twisted narrative structures (Samurai Champloo 01 & Jinrui wa Suitai Shimashita are some of my favorites), but this shit doesn’t feel like it knows where it’s going.
There seems to be a great divide of opinion between those who love Revolutio’s jerky pacing and others who vehemently hate it. Interesting.
What’d you think of baccano and mushoku tensei?
Baccano was fine, dunno what Mushoku is though.
>Rakudai Kishi in Dropped/10
>Asterisk in Meh/10
>First episodes so similar you can’t even tell which was which
Did you even try when making this list, or did you just rate everything at random?
If you honestly believe their quality is equivalent, then I guess you really aren’t wearing that Magic Kaito avatar ironically.
Wait, you’re NOT joking?
*grabs popcorn
As surprising as it may be to the kinda person for whom Highlights for Kids would be an indecipherable tome, I am indeed able to differentiate between two different objects without trouble.
I’d say you should seek professional help, but I think the only cure for what you have is euthanasia. Might need to ask someone for assistance on that, cuz you’d probably fail at suicide too.
Wow, that’s a whole lot of butthurt right there.
No worries, I wrote it as dispassionately as I would cut my nails or vacuum my carpet. Don’t have much effort to expend on nobodies after all.
So you tell people to commit suicide as dispassionately as you would cut your nails, Mr. Somebody? I’d say you’re the one who needs professional help, not me. But hey, what do I know? I can’t hide my shitty personality behind some fancy words.
Well yeah, the fuck do I care whether you expire in your sleep 3 years from now in the back of a Denny’s dumpster or today in your mother’s bathtub cuz the coolest cat on the internet told you to slit your wrists for the lulz? You’re just another meaningless body with bad taste in anime, all said and done.
I don’t reckon many people – if any – would mourn you, so I don’t see why it makes *me* the villain for taking an apathetic stance. Get some perspective, please.
Also: down the road, not across the street.
Relax, kid (I’m assuming you’re a kid from the way you’re writing… if I’m wrong, then you’re even more pitiful). I don’t know what happened to you in your life to make you such a pathetic piece of shit, but you seriously need to chill.
Can’t handle the bants m8; I feel sorry for ya bud.
If you didn’t wanna get rekt, you shouldn’t have tried to step. Oh well, you can always try again next time. My readers do so love salt factories. <3
>as dispassionately as I would cut my nails or vacuum my carpet
Having seen him write posts and shit first hand, he DOES write the most inciting stuff quite dispassionately, LOL.
It’s a gift, quite frankly.
I disagree, it’s much harder to convey a contrary opinion in a respectful way that gets your point across and has a chance of changing someone’s mind.
Being an ass is way funnier for the peanut gallery though.
They should have released second season of Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance this season and everything will be perfect.
Please. This Evans is already trying to escape, it doesn’t need outside help.
Man even I like Asterisk War because I’m a sucker for decent supernatural fights but there’s like, better supernatural fights in like Hamatora and Raildex it really is not that good
Asterisk isn’t that bad at all.
I read the novel, and the story is perfectly fine. Quite interesting, in fact.
I feel pretty similarly to that, but comparing it to other stuff I’ve seen, there’s still more substantial stuff out there
Fucking Cardfight Vanguard why does it still exist.
“I don’t want this to end up being another Galilei Donna situation.”
Never forget :(
OPM is fine, the premise is not limited to “a guy punches things once and they die”, it’s more a matter of no matter how strong you are, you’re only one and can only be in one place at a time. If you read it you’ll find that there’s more than that to the story. I’m totally fangirling, but you know I may have a point.
>Not watching Owari
>Gundam in Meh/10
The only thing saving your shit taste is that you know well enough to put Utaware in the top 5 of your list.
Sometimes i wonder if you are just trying to shit up Dark_Sage :P
I cannot judge it tough since i usually am like a half year behind on shows bar a couple that really stand out.
I can’t tell myself sometimes.
Thanks D_S. I don’t know how I’d decide which shows to watch without you.
That makes two of us.
Is Subete ga F ni Naru that good, D_S?
Fuck it, I’ll just watch it.
Well it’s good if you’re into slow, dark, character-focused dramas (which is what I got from episode 1).
Let me know how ya liked it. Sure as hell ain’t for everyone.
Damn, it’s exactly as you said.
Sasuga me-sama.
fuck i could have made this list. except that it would have all been filed under “UTTER FUCKING GARBAGE” and it would be filled with all anime ever.
fucking cartoons
Whoa there buddy. In the interests of work safety, I must ask you to get a sharps bin to contain all that edge.
You’re a total shit
Dark_Sage please get Funi http://imgur.com/a/0xvWg#_=_
It appears Funimation needs a fumigation.
Tantei Team KZ Jiken Note ?
It’s rather astonishing how effectively we’ve just demonstrated the the worst part of being an anime fan is, in fact, anime fans.
Utawarerumono and Sakurako are a must.
I watched Lance N’ Masques since the loli was so damn cute. EP 2 got better but we will see how it goes.