This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.
A guide for the new aniblogger.
Why write a top 10?
- It’s easy.
- It’s really easy.
- People read them.
Pander Pander Pander
The goal of any top 10 list is not to get your opinion across, but rather the opinions of your readers. After all, they’re not reading your blog for your fucking thoughts; they just want to look into that mirror called a monitor and smile when it shows what they want to see.
So how do you tap into that? Well that’s where the top-ten list comes in. The ultimate goal here is for your list to be so non-offensive that they can’t help but tolerate you. That’s how you find aniblog success! (Just ask psgels.)
Top 10? What about Top 11?
Rookie question. Always do a Top 10. Any more than 10 and it feels like the “honor” of being included is insignificant. Any less and you stand the risk of offending the fans of the series you exclude.
Don’t think. Just do it.
Narrow it down
There are way too many anime in a season to choose from for a Top 10 list, so you’re gonna have to narrow down your choices.
Make it clear in your top 10 that you’re not going to include short anime (3-minute shows, for example), second cours, or direct sequels to recently aired shows. This means that people can’t complain that you didn’t include their most favoritest show ever because, hey, you’re just playing by the rules. Super easy to cut shit out then.
Narrow it down even more
Now cut out anything that has fewer than 3000 people scoring it on MAL. If people aren’t watching the show, nobody will have issues with you ignoring it.
Also get rid of the ecchi-focused shows. Fans of series like that are used to being marginalized — they won’t complain if you leave out their favorite shows.
Choosing the final 10
Top 3
I sure hope you’ve been keeping a pulse on what’s popular on 4chan, reddit, and MyAnimeList. The audience on each of these sites is pretty damn similar and your readers are likely culled from their ranks. If you avoid what each site’s hivemind has determined is good, you risk their internet wrath.
For Fall 2012, the hiveminds have determined you must like JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure and Chuunibyou. If you don’t include them in your top 3, you may as well just shut down your blog now. Include an intellectual show as well, to show that you is so smarts.
You should rank them as follows: the most popular show, then the most intellectual show, then the show with the worst fanbase.
I mean, just look at this. Doesn’t it seem “right”?
Numbers 4-10
Okay, the top 3 were easy. Now you have to fill out the other 7 spots. Gonna be hard, right? Wrong!
All you have to do is figure out which shows are the most enjoyed by fucknuts with no taste and even less shame. Yup, it’s time to pander to the lowest class of anime fan: the anime fan.
Now that you have what you want, let’s rank them by assumed popularity. 4-6 will be the shows that people would be most angry at for being ranked too low. Spots 7 through 10 go to shows whose fans would just be happy enough to see them on a list.
And there you have it! Your rankings are complete, so it’s time to put it all together. Feast your eyes on
Your Top Ten:
1. Chuunibyou Demo Koi Ga Shitanai!
2. Shinsekai Yori
3. JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure
4. Tonari no Kaibutsu-kun
5. Psycho-Pass
6. Zetsuen no Tempest
7. Robotics;Notes
8. Sakurasou No Pet Na Kanojo
9. Sukitte Ii Na Yo
10. Girls und Panzer
Sure, your list may have no personality or heart, but it is non-offensive. Watch the tepid responses masquerading as love flow in. And hey, even though the list may not match up with what you honestly feel the best shows were, doesn’t it just look good? You’d be forgiven for fooling yourself into thinking you came up with it yourself.
>watching anime
See, that’s what’s so great about aniblogging. You can make posts like top tens without even watching the shows. Just say something about the characters being good, visuals being interesting, and the story being touching and you’re good to go.
Is Jojo bad or something, it’s one of the best shounens I’ve watched in like a while. I mean I wouldn’t say it’s perfect or anything like that, I haven’t been paying attention to criticism or praise for the show, so I don’t know if there’s some kind of infamy or something surrounding it.
I like it, but I don’t think the flattery surrounding it is honest. People go way out of their way to hype it and its characters up, and because of this it seems like every bit of praise is done tongue-in-cheek. The fanbase is almost entirely inorganic and it shows.
Ah, well I haven’t been around the fanbase, but I gave it a 10/10 on MAL(laugh at me please) because it was pretty refreshing and I feel it did everything I feel like it set out to do from the first episode right.
But eh , whatever, that sounds pretty bad though.
I don’t think you should be ashamed for liking the show. I enjoy it too. My issue is with its “fanbase”.
No I was talking about me mentioning what I rated it on MAL.
But yeah that sucks.
I fail to see what’s so bad about its fanbase.
The threads I visit are usually civil and fabulous (<- Look Mom, I'm doing it too!).
Yes, they are exaggerating, but I prefer such a behaviour over constant shitposting any day.
Actually it has one of the best fanbases, full of people who have been following the manga for ages. All the threads are great with no bullshit or serious shitstorms/flamewars. Yes, maybe we act over the top sometimes but that’s JoJo for you, if you can’t handle the FABULOUS it’s not our fault.
I think one thing about jojo’s fans, especially the real ones that have read the manga and been waiting for so long for this adaption. Is that they’ve all pushed very hard for people to check the series out, and now that it’s finally got an adaption it’s even easier to get people to take notice and give it a shot. Also there are people who naturally get that jojo’s is unintentionally hilarious, but for some people it just doesn’t click and it’s hard to really explain that to new viewers now. Though I think it’s pretty easy to just bring up that it’s from the 80s and therefore it has and old shonen style that you shouldn’t feel bad if you think it’s hilarious.
The characters are good, the visuals are interesting, and the story is touching.
Clannad is awesome!
I’m surprised you haven’t made a ranking list of ranking lists.
>shitanai
Well, you got it right the first few times.
Hey man, I mildly like your satire! Great job! You know what you should totally do? You should totally make a list! So I could mildly like that too. Cram it with personality and heart, like only some blogger somewhere could when making an anime top 10 list! I like it 60% personality and 40% heart, but different proportions are mildly okay as well! Don’t forget to forget HxH again in your list of ongoing shows! That thing has no fans anywhere! And of course, I must mildly demand that you mildly argue that SAO is the best show you’ve seen in the last decade!
Keywords: mildness, list, personality, heart, bitching on the Internet, bitching about anime on the Internet, bitching about lists on the Internet, bitching about anime fans on the Internet, Internet on the Internet while you Internet the shit out of Internet, Internet, Internet.
>this fucking theme
10/10
So I’ve decided to see how things going on the other side and collected some information from pixiv:
BTOOOM! 298
Chuunibyou Demo Koi Ga Shitai! 6590
Code:Breaker 1344
Girls und Panzer 1550 (original)
Ixion Saga DT 692 (original)
Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure 40939
K 3927 (original)
Kamisama Hajimemashita 1529
Little Busters 12551
Magi 45874
Psycho-Pass 2417 (original)
Robotics;Notes 663
Sakurasou No Pet Na Kanojo 735
Shinsekai Yori 357
Sukitte Ii Na Yo 111
Tonari no Kaibutsu-kun 1922
Zetsuen no Tempest 733
Pixiv is dominated by fujoshi hence the large feedback for K and Magi compared to the rest
But you can have a Top 11! Just wait until there’s any Code Geass release and cram it there. Apparently humor is appreciated in anime blogs.
Can I hug you?
Here’s my Fall Top Ten:
> Also get rid of the ecchi-focused shows.
> Hidamari Sketch X Honeycomb (1097)
wtf?
> Now cut out anything that has fewer than 3000 people scoring it on MAL.
“Yup, it’s time to pander to the lowest class of anime fan: the anime fan.”
Fucking beautiful. I might steal this line someday