Translation Party: [Commie vs FFF vs Hiryuu vs HorribleSubs] The Best Anime of All the Ever Times Ever (Episode 01)

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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Saying you’re an anime fan who just happens to not like SAO is like saying you’re a good person who just happens to rape children.

Translation Party House Rules:

Spoiler for
1. Translation Parties are intended to help you make the best subtitle choice for a given anime. Choose which line(s) you liked best by selecting them with the checkbox.

2. I split the Party into two parts — Essential and Extended. Assuming you want to get this shit over with quickly, just go with the Essential choices. I picked these to be the most representative lines in the releases. But if you’re one of those people who want more comparisons to help you come to a decision, go with the Essential choices and the Extended ones.

3. If you didn’t like any of the lines, choose the “N/A” option. The results for “N/A” won’t be automatically tabulated, so you’ll have to do the math in your head. Have my gomens and nasais.

4. A “>” indicates that another character has begun speaking. If there are three characters in a line comparison, I will indicate the third with a “>>” and so on for more characters.

5. Group order is randomized for each screenshot, every time you refresh the page. However, the “N/A” option will always appear at the bottom of the screen.

6. Your results will be summed up when you click the “Get your results” button. Feel free to vote in the poll at the end/post in the comments to let others know how you did and to compare your results with them.

7. Party hard.

 

 

Sword Art Online II – Episode 01

Comparisons: 9 or 18

Participants:

Commie

FFF

Hiryuu

HorribleSubs

Codes:

{\i1} indicates the start of italics

{\i0} indicates the close of italics

 

 

 

Essential 1.

Reporter-chan talking.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 01

Commie :: Now that’s what we’d expect to hear
from the best player of the most hardcore VRMMO, Gun Gale Online.
Who needs the meta, right?

FFF :: A daring provocation from the top player of the most hardcore VRMMO, Gun Gale Online!
You’re pretty harsh!

Hiryuu :: As expected, the top player of {\i1}Gun Gale Online{\i0},
which is said to be the hardest VRMMO of all time, has quite a unique take on the matter.

HorribleSubs :: That’s what we’d expect to hear
from the top player of the most hardcore VRMMO, Gun Gale Online.
Pretty extreme!

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Essential 2.

Reporter-chan talking to Blue-kun. As a note, the anime itself calls the tourney “Bullet of Bullets“, but that does sound pretty stupid, so your call on which is the best route to take.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 02

Commie :: Don’t you have your sights set on the next Ballet of Bullets?
>Of course.
>When I play,
>I play to win.

FFF :: Aren’t you aiming to win the next Bullet of Bullets?
>Of course!
>If I’m entering, I’m playing to win!

Hiryuu :: You’re aiming to win the Bullet of Bullets again, right?
>Well, of course.
>I’m participating, so I’ll be gunning for the top.

HorribleSubs :: Aren’t you aiming for the next Ballet of Bullets?
>Of course.
>If I’m going to enter,
>I’ll play to win!

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Essential 3.

Blue guy with some startling insight.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 03

Commie :: It’s true that, until now, the optimal strategy
has been to raise your agility and fire a powerful, physical weapon as fast as possible.
But the meta is always changing.

FFF :: It’s true that the best strategy so far has been to raise your AGI
and fire a powerful physical weapon as fast as possible.
However, the balance of an MMO changes all the time.

Hiryuu :: I’ll agree that increasing agility and rapid firing
with a powerful automatic was the optimal playstyle up until now.
But it’s natural for an MMO’s metagame to keep evolving.

HorribleSubs :: It’s true that, until now, the strongest strategy
has been to raise your AGI, and fire a powerful physical weapon as fast as possible.
But the balance of a MMO changes all the time.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Essential 4.

Kirito and Asuna looking quite normal here.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 04

Commie :: Hey, Asuna.
>Wh-What?
It’s just…
Those clothes look good on you.
They bring back a lot of memories.
>Yeah, but I don’t have a rapier.

FFF :: Hey, Asuna.
>Wh-Why are you staring?
Well, it’s like your outfit is really appropriate for you.
Brings back a lot of memories.
>Yeah, but I don’t have a rapier this time.

Hiryuu :: Hey, Asuna.
>Wh-What’s wrong?
Oh, well,
I was just thinking you look nice in those clothes.
It really takes me back.
>I guess so.
>I’m missing my rapier though.

HorribleSubs :: Hey, Asuna.
>Wh-What?
It’s just…
Those clothes look good on you.
They bring back a lot of memories…
>Yeah, but I don’t have a rapier.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Essential 5.

Haha, guys, amirite?

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 05

Commie :: So we both happen to be wearing our old colors today.
What are the chances, right?
>Well, if we meet all the time over the course of a year…
Just nod your head and agree, jeez!

FFF :: So we both happen to be wearing our old colors today!
What are the chances of that?
>Well, considering how often we’ve met up over the last year—
Jeez! You were supposed to agree with me!

Hiryuu :: So today we just happened to wear the same colors as back then.
What a coincidence, right?
>Well, after a year of dating, it was bound to happen—
That’s where you were supposed to say, “Sure is!”

HorribleSubs :: So we both happen to be wearing our old colors today…
What are the odds of that?
>Well, if we meet all the time over a year—
Just say, “Yeah, you’re right!”

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Essential 6.

She’s AI, who cares?

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 06

Commie :: I want to stay with you forever, Kirito.
It’d be great if Yui could be with us here too.
>That’ll be possible,
>once we can use an augmented reality environment whenever we want.
>Right now, the amount of information is too much to handle.

FFF :: I want to stay with you forever, Kirito-kun.
It’d be great if Yui-chan could be here with us, too!
>That’ll be possible once we can use an augmented reality environment whenever we want.
>Right now, there’s too much difference in the amount of information.

Hiryuu :: It’d be nice if we could always be together.
Well, I mean, that includes Yui-chan too, of course.
>We’ll be able to live together again someday.
>Once virtual reality becomes more readily accessible, that is.
>Right now, the data requirements are too great.

HorribleSubs :: I want to stay with you forever, Kirito-kun.
It’d be great if Yui-chan could be with us here, too…
>That’ll be possible,
>once we can use an augmented reality environment whenever we want.
>Right now, there’s too much difference in the amount of information.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Essential 7.

I don’t know either.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 07

Commie :: “Lightly Salted Tarako?” He was playing the game at the time.
He was at a meeting with his squadron.
I guess that’s what they call a guild.
It was in Glocken City plaza…
that he was shot by another player.

FFF :: Usushio Tarako?
He was playing the game at the time.
He was in a meeting with his squadron—I suppose that’s what they call guilds in this game—at a plaza in Glocken City.
That’s when he was shot by another player.

Hiryuu :: His handle was Lightly Salted Roe.
This incident took place in-game.
At the time of his death,
he was apparently at the central plaza of Glocken City with his squadron—
the equivalent of a guild, it seems—for a gathering.
It was then that a player came from nowhere and shot him.

HorribleSubs :: Lightly Salted Tarako? He was playing the game at the time.
He was at a meeting with his squadron…
I guess that’s what they call a guild…
in a Glocken City plaza…
When he was shot by another player.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Essential 8.

Goddammit, Japan. We should’ve never let you watch the Fast and Furious movies.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 08

Commie :: Zexceed and Lightly Salted Tarako were both renowned world-class players.
In other words, he won’t shoot you unless you’re good. Probably.
Kayaba himself recognized you as the best player…

FFF :: Zexceed and Usushio Tarako were both renowned top-class players.
In other words, he {\i1}probably{\i0} won’t shoot you unless you’re good.
Kayaba-sensei recognized you as the strongest player—

Hiryuu :: Both Zexceed and Lightly Salted Roe were well-known, top players.
So he’ll only target you if you’re on that level. Probably.
If it’s you, who {\i1}the{\i0} Dr. Kayaba recognized as the strongest—

HorribleSubs :: Zexceed and Lightly Salted Tarako were both renowned top-level players.
In other words, he won’t shoot you unless you’re good. Probably.
Kayaba-sensei recognized you as the strongest player—

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Essential 9.

If you watched this scene and didn’t wanna lick her eye, there’s something wrong with you.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Essential 09

Commie :: This pressure, this unease…
This terror…
1,500 meters?
Like shooting fish in a barrel.

FFF :: This pressure, this suspense…
This terror…
1,500 meters?
That’s like tossing a ball of paper in a trash can.

Hiryuu :: This pressure…
This anxiety…
This fear…
A distance of 1500?
That’s as simple as throwing a paper ball into a waste basket.

HorribleSubs :: This pressure, this unease…
This terror…
1,500 meters?
That’s like tossing a wad of paper in a wastebasket.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

 

Decision Point:

  1. So D_S, you uhh… got more of those Kirito pics for me? (Maybe. There’s 9 more pics in the spoiler. Just might be some of the good stuff. Might not be either, but that’s the risk you gotta weigh.)
  2. You promised traps, D_S. There were no traps in this episode, just stupid fucking setup. (All right, calm down. Head to the results and wait for the next episode to air. I’m sure we’ll get our traps then.)

 

Spoiler for

Expanded 1.

After getting through this comparison, you’ll have more than double your daily recommended dose of literacy. (Protip: You can skip any comparisons you want and it won’t even break the internet.)

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 01

Commie :: It’s a popular misconception that agility is the only stat worth stacking.
To be clear, it {\i1}is{\i0} an important stat.
And firing speed and dodging?
If you were good at those two things, you were good.
Until now, anyway.
That’s all in the past now.
And to those of you who spent the past eight months of your life leveling agility…
Well, sucks to be you.

FFF :: The idea that agility is the only stat that matters is merely an illusion.
Sure, agility is an important stat.
Firing speed and evasion…
Proficiency in those two areas made you one of the elite…
once upon a time.
But all of that is in the past now
And to all the players who spent the last eight months shutting themselves out from the world to raise that stat:
Sucks to be you!

Hiryuu :: People seem to have the misconception that agility is the ultimate stat.
But that’s not to say it isn’t important.
The combination of quick firing and evasion certainly makes for a strong build.
That’s how it’s always been.
Until now, that is.
To the speed freaks who spent eight months putting all their points into agility,
I only have two words to say:
My condolences.

HorribleSubs :: The idea that agility is the only stat that matters is only an illusion.
Sure, agility is an important stat.
Firing speed and dodging…
If you were good at those two things, you were good.
Until now, anyway.
But that’s all in the past now.
And to those of you who spent
the past eight months never leaving the house, raising that stat…
Sucks to be you.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Expanded 2.

This is so cheesy, I can only imagine Death Guns is targeting people with lactose intolerance.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 02

Commie :: This is true power!
True strength.
Fools! Remember this name and fear!
The name this gun and I share! Death Gun!

FFF :: This is true power! True strength!
Fools, remember the name and fear it!
The name that this gun and I share: Death Gun!

Hiryuu :: This is true power… true strength!
All of you fools would do well to burn this name into your memories!
Fear the name my gun and I share:
Death Gun!

HorribleSubs :: This is true power!
True strength.
Fools… Remember this name, and fear!
The name this gun and I share! Death Gun!

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Expanded 3.

Deep.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 03

Commie :: What’s the difference between the real world and the virtual one?
The amount of information. That’s all.

FFF :: What’s the difference between the real world and the virtual one?
The amount of information. That’s all.

Hiryuu :: That the virtual and real worlds only differ by the amount of data.

HorribleSubs :: What’s the difference between the real world and the virtual one?
The amount of information. That’s all.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Expanded 4.

Kirito getting wined and dined.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 04

Commie :: Everything’s on me, so order whatever you want.
>I’ll do that, then. Thank you very much.
Oh, don’t be so formal.
Just talk to me like you would in ALO.

FFF :: I’m paying, so order whatever you like.
>Then I shall. Thank you very much.
Oh, don’t be so formal!
Just talk to me like you would in ALO.

Hiryuu :: It’ll be my treat, so order whatever you like.
>Then I shall take you up on that offer.
Talking like that really doesn’t suit you.
You sound uncomfortable, so just talk like we’re in ALO.

HorribleSubs :: I’ll pay, so order whatever you want.
>I’ll do that, then. Thank you very much.
Oh, don’t be so formal…
Just talk to me like you would in ALO.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Expanded 5.

Words.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 05

Commie :: He had won a tournament in Gun Gale Online, GGO for short,
that was held in October to determine the best player.

FFF :: He won a tournament in Gun Gale Online, or GGO,
that was held in October to determine the strongest player.

Hiryuu :: In {\i1}Gun Gale Online{\i0}, GGO for short,
he apparently won first place in a ranking tournament held this October.

HorribleSubs :: He had won a tournament in Gun Gale Online, GGO for short,
that was held in October, to determine the strongest player.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Expanded 6.

Kirito being angsty <3

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 06

Commie :: You’ve already looked into all this, haven’t you?
If you smarty pants have thought this through,
there shouldn’t be much left for me to do.

FFF :: You’ve already looked into all of this, haven’t you?
If you {\i1}elite officials{\i0} have already thought about it this much,
there can’t be much left that I can help with.

Hiryuu :: You’ve already thought all of this through, haven’t you?
I doubt I can contribute anything you smart guys haven’t already thought of.

HorribleSubs :: You’ve already looked into all this, haven’t you?
If you smarty pants have thought this through,
there shouldn’t be much left for me to do.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Expanded 7.

Thanks for explaining the concept of pro gamers to us. We wouldn’t have gotten the idea from the title.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 07

Commie :: The pros are the ones who can earn money in GGO every single month.
A really good player can make anywhere from 200,000 to 300,000 yen a month.
For that reason, the best GGO players
spend far more time and effort on their game than other MMO gamers.
I can’t just log in and expect to match them.

FFF :: The pros are the ones who can earn money in GGO every single month.
A top player can make anywhere from 200,000 to 300,000 yen a month.
For that reason, the high-level GGO players
spend far more time and resources on their game than other MMO players.
I can’t just log in and expect to compete with them.

Hiryuu :: Pros are the guys making money every month playing GGO.
I hear the top players earn from 200,000 to 300,000 yen a month.
And because of that,
the best players in GGO put in time and effort that’s leagues beyond that of players of other games.
As if I’d stand a chance against them.

HorribleSubs :: The pros are the ones who can earn money in GGO every single month.
A top player can make anywhere from 200,000 to 300,000 yen a month.
For that reason, the high-level GGO players
spend far more time and passion on their game than other MMO players.
I can’t just log in and expect to match them.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Expanded 8.

That’s what happens when you spread your Seed everywhere, Kirito.

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 08

Commie :: Since the Seed went public,
all kinds of shady virtual worlds have popped up.
Which means the only way to get at the truth
is to make contact with them within the game.

FFF :: Ever since The Seed went public, all kinds of shady virtual worlds have popped up.
That means that making contact with them from inside the game is the only way to get to the truth.

Hiryuu :: Ever since the Seed was released, \Nall sorts of shady VR worlds have sprouted forth.
That’s why if we’re going to try to catch them,
we have no choice but to make contact in the game ourselves.

HorribleSubs :: Since The Seed went public,
all kinds of shady virtual worlds have popped up.
Which means the only way to get at the truth
is to make contact with them within the game.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

Expanded 9.

Of course he will. Protagonist-kun never backs down when the chips are on the table!

Audio:

Sword Art Online II Extended 09

Commie :: Of course, we’ll take every safety precaution.
And I won’t tell you to get shot.
Just tell me your impressions and give me your judgment.
Will you go?

FFF :: Of course, we’ll take every safety precaution.
I’m not telling you to go get shot.
Just tell me your impressions, and give me your judgment.
Will you do this?

Hiryuu :: We’ll of course take utmost care to ensure your safety.
We’re not asking you to get shot.
You just need to make a judgment based on what you observe.
You’ll do it, right?

HorribleSubs :: Of course, we’ll take every safety precaution.
And I won’t tell you to get shot.
Just tell me your impressions, and give me your judgment.
Will you go?

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

 

 

 

 

 

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Which group had which line (unformatted, lazy-mode Sage):

Spoiler for

Essential 1.

Reporter-chan talking.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO01.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 01

Commie :: Now that’s what we’d expect to hear
from the best player of the most hardcore VRMMO, Gun Gale Online.
Who needs the meta, right?

FFF :: A daring provocation from the top player of the most hardcore VRMMO, Gun Gale Online!
You’re pretty harsh!

Hiryuu :: As expected, the top player of {\i1}Gun Gale Online{\i0},
which is said to be the hardest VRMMO of all time, has quite a unique take on the matter.

HorribleSubs :: That’s what we’d expect to hear
from the top player of the most hardcore VRMMO, Gun Gale Online.
Pretty extreme!

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 2.

Reporter-chan talking to Blue-kun. As a note, the anime itself calls the tourney “Bullet of Bullets”, but that does sound pretty stupid, so your call on which is the best route to take.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO02.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 02

Commie :: Don’t you have your sights set on the next Ballet of Bullets?
>Of course.
>When I play,
>I play to win.

FFF :: Aren’t you aiming to win the next Bullet of Bullets?
>Of course!
>If I’m entering, I’m playing to win!

Hiryuu :: You’re aiming to win the Bullet of Bullets again, right?
>Well, of course.
>I’m participating, so I’ll be gunning for the top.

HorribleSubs :: Aren’t you aiming for the next Ballet of Bullets?
>Of course.
>If I’m going to enter,
>I’ll play to win!

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 3.

Blue guy with some startling insight.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO03.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 03

Commie :: It’s true that, until now, the optimal strategy
has been to raise your agility and fire a powerful, physical weapon as fast as possible.
But the meta is always changing.

FFF :: It’s true that the best strategy so far has been to raise your AGI
and fire a powerful physical weapon as fast as possible.
However, the balance of an MMO changes all the time.

Hiryuu :: I’ll agree that increasing agility and rapid firing
with a powerful automatic was the optimal playstyle up until now.
But it’s natural for an MMO’s metagame to keep evolving.

HorribleSubs :: It’s true that, until now, the strongest strategy
has been to raise your AGI, and fire a powerful physical weapon as fast as possible.
But the balance of a MMO changes all the time.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 4.

Kirito and Asuna looking quite normal here.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO04.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 04

Commie :: Hey, Asuna.
>Wh-What?
It’s just…
Those clothes look good on you.
They bring back a lot of memories.
>Yeah, but I don’t have a rapier.

FFF :: Hey, Asuna.
>Wh-Why are you staring?
Well, it’s like your outfit is really appropriate for you.
Brings back a lot of memories.
>Yeah, but I don’t have a rapier this time.

Hiryuu :: Hey, Asuna.
>Wh-What’s wrong?
Oh, well,
I was just thinking you look nice in those clothes.
It really takes me back.
>I guess so.
>I’m missing my rapier though.

HorribleSubs :: Hey, Asuna.
>Wh-What?
It’s just…
Those clothes look good on you.
They bring back a lot of memories…
>Yeah, but I don’t have a rapier.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 5.

Haha, guys, amirite?

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO05.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 05

Commie :: So we both happen to be wearing our old colors today.
What are the chances, right?
>Well, if we meet all the time over the course of a year…
Just nod your head and agree, jeez!

FFF :: So we both happen to be wearing our old colors today!
What are the chances of that?
>Well, considering how often we’ve met up over the last year—
Jeez! You were supposed to agree with me!

Hiryuu :: So today we just happened to wear the same colors as back then.
What a coincidence, right?
>Well, after a year of dating, it was bound to happen—
That’s where you were supposed to say, “Sure is!”

HorribleSubs :: So we both happen to be wearing our old colors today…
What are the odds of that?
>Well, if we meet all the time over a year—
Just say, “Yeah, you’re right!”

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 6.

She’s AI, who cares?

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO06.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 06

Commie :: I want to stay with you forever, Kirito.
It’d be great if Yui could be with us here too.
>That’ll be possible,
>once we can use an augmented reality environment whenever we want.
>Right now, the amount of information is too much to handle.

FFF :: I want to stay with you forever, Kirito-kun.
It’d be great if Yui-chan could be here with us, too!
>That’ll be possible once we can use an augmented reality environment whenever we want.
>Right now, there’s too much difference in the amount of information.

Hiryuu :: It’d be nice if we could always be together.
Well, I mean, that includes Yui-chan too, of course.
>We’ll be able to live together again someday.
>Once virtual reality becomes more readily accessible, that is.
>Right now, the data requirements are too great.

HorribleSubs :: I want to stay with you forever, Kirito-kun.
It’d be great if Yui-chan could be with us here, too…
>That’ll be possible,
>once we can use an augmented reality environment whenever we want.
>Right now, there’s too much difference in the amount of information.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 7.

I don’t know either.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO07.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 07

Commie :: “Lightly Salted Tarako?” He was playing the game at the time.
He was at a meeting with his squadron.
I guess that’s what they call a guild.
It was in Glocken City plaza…
that he was shot by another player.

FFF :: Usushio Tarako?
He was playing the game at the time.
He was in a meeting with his squadron—I suppose that’s what they call guilds in this game—at a plaza in Glocken City.
That’s when he was shot by another player.

Hiryuu :: His handle was Lightly Salted Roe.
This incident took place in-game.
At the time of his death,
he was apparently at the central plaza of Glocken City with his squadron—
the equivalent of a guild, it seems—for a gathering.
It was then that a player came from nowhere and shot him.

HorribleSubs :: Lightly Salted Tarako? He was playing the game at the time.
He was at a meeting with his squadron…
I guess that’s what they call a guild…
in a Glocken City plaza…
When he was shot by another player.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 8.

Goddammit, Japan. We should’ve never let you watch the Fast and Furious movies.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO08.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 08

Commie :: Zexceed and Lightly Salted Tarako were both renowned world-class players.
In other words, he won’t shoot you unless you’re good. Probably.
Kayaba himself recognized you as the best player…

FFF :: Zexceed and Usushio Tarako were both renowned top-class players.
In other words, he {\i1}probably{\i0} won’t shoot you unless you’re good.
Kayaba-sensei recognized you as the strongest player—

Hiryuu :: Both Zexceed and Lightly Salted Roe were well-known, top players.
So he’ll only target you if you’re on that level. Probably.
If it’s you, who {\i1}the{\i0} Dr. Kayaba recognized as the strongest—

HorribleSubs :: Zexceed and Lightly Salted Tarako were both renowned top-level players.
In other words, he won’t shoot you unless you’re good. Probably.
Kayaba-sensei recognized you as the strongest player—

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Essential 9.

If you watched this scene and didn’t wanna lick her eye, there’s something wrong with you.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAO09.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Essential 09

Commie :: This pressure, this unease…
This terror…
1,500 meters?
Like shooting fish in a barrel.

FFF :: This pressure, this suspense…
This terror…
1,500 meters?
That’s like tossing a ball of paper in a trash can.

Hiryuu :: This pressure…
This anxiety…
This fear…
A distance of 1500?
That’s as simple as throwing a paper ball into a waste basket.

HorribleSubs :: This pressure, this unease…
This terror…
1,500 meters?
That’s like tossing a wad of paper in a wastebasket.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 1.

After getting through this comparison, you’ll have more than double your daily recommended dose of literacy. (Protip: You can skip any comparisons you want and it won’t even break the internet.)

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE01.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 01

Commie :: It’s a popular misconception that agility is the only stat worth stacking.
To be clear, it {\i1}is{\i0} an important stat.
And firing speed and dodging?
If you were good at those two things, you were good.
Until now, anyway.
That’s all in the past now.
And to those of you who spent the past eight months of your life leveling agility…
Well, sucks to be you.

FFF :: The idea that agility is the only stat that matters is merely an illusion.
Sure, agility is an important stat.
Firing speed and evasion…
Proficiency in those two areas made you one of the elite…
once upon a time.
But all of that is in the past now
And to all the players who spent the last eight months shutting themselves out from the world to raise that stat:
Sucks to be you!

Hiryuu :: People seem to have the misconception that agility is the ultimate stat.
But that’s not to say it isn’t important.
The combination of quick firing and evasion certainly makes for a strong build.
That’s how it’s always been.
Until now, that is.
To the speed freaks who spent eight months putting all their points into agility,
I only have two words to say:
My condolences.

HorribleSubs :: The idea that agility is the only stat that matters is only an illusion.
Sure, agility is an important stat.
Firing speed and dodging…
If you were good at those two things, you were good.
Until now, anyway.
But that’s all in the past now.
And to those of you who spent
the past eight months never leaving the house, raising that stat…
Sucks to be you.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 2.

This is so cheesy, I can only imagine Death Guns is targeting people with lactose intolerance.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE02.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 02

Commie :: This is true power!
True strength.
Fools! Remember this name and fear!
The name this gun and I share! Death Gun!

FFF :: This is true power! True strength!
Fools, remember the name and fear it!
The name that this gun and I share: Death Gun!

Hiryuu :: This is true power… true strength!
All of you fools would do well to burn this name into your memories!
Fear the name my gun and I share:
Death Gun!

HorribleSubs :: This is true power!
True strength.
Fools… Remember this name, and fear!
The name this gun and I share! Death Gun!

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 3.

Deep.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE03.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 03

Commie :: What’s the difference between the real world and the virtual one?
The amount of information. That’s all.

FFF :: What’s the difference between the real world and the virtual one?
The amount of information. That’s all.

Hiryuu :: That the virtual and real worlds only differ by the amount of data.

HorribleSubs :: What’s the difference between the real world and the virtual one?
The amount of information. That’s all.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 4.

Kirito getting wined and dined.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE04.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 04

Commie :: Everything’s on me, so order whatever you want.
>I’ll do that, then. Thank you very much.
Oh, don’t be so formal.
Just talk to me like you would in ALO.

FFF :: I’m paying, so order whatever you like.
>Then I shall. Thank you very much.
Oh, don’t be so formal!
Just talk to me like you would in ALO.

Hiryuu :: It’ll be my treat, so order whatever you like.
>Then I shall take you up on that offer.
Talking like that really doesn’t suit you.
You sound uncomfortable, so just talk like we’re in ALO.

HorribleSubs :: I’ll pay, so order whatever you want.
>I’ll do that, then. Thank you very much.
Oh, don’t be so formal…
Just talk to me like you would in ALO.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 5.

Words.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE05.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 05

Commie :: He had won a tournament in Gun Gale Online, GGO for short,
that was held in October to determine the best player.

FFF :: He won a tournament in Gun Gale Online, or GGO,
that was held in October to determine the strongest player.

Hiryuu :: In {\i1}Gun Gale Online{\i0}, GGO for short,
he apparently won first place in a ranking tournament held this October.

HorribleSubs :: He had won a tournament in Gun Gale Online, GGO for short,
that was held in October, to determine the strongest player.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 6.

Kirito being angsty <3

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE06.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 06

Commie :: You’ve already looked into all this, haven’t you?
If you smarty pants have thought this through,
there shouldn’t be much left for me to do.

FFF :: You’ve already looked into all of this, haven’t you?
If you {\i1}elite officials{\i0} have already thought about it this much,
there can’t be much left that I can help with.

Hiryuu :: You’ve already thought all of this through, haven’t you?
I doubt I can contribute anything you smart guys haven’t already thought of.

HorribleSubs :: You’ve already looked into all this, haven’t you?
If you smarty pants have thought this through,
there shouldn’t be much left for me to do.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 7.

Thanks for explaining the concept of pro gamers to us. We wouldn’t have gotten the idea from the title.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE07.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 07

Commie :: The pros are the ones who can earn money in GGO every single month.
A really good player can make anywhere from 200,000 to 300,000 yen a month.
For that reason, the best GGO players
spend far more time and effort on their game than other MMO gamers.
I can’t just log in and expect to match them.

FFF :: The pros are the ones who can earn money in GGO every single month.
A top player can make anywhere from 200,000 to 300,000 yen a month.
For that reason, the high-level GGO players
spend far more time and resources on their game than other MMO players.
I can’t just log in and expect to compete with them.

Hiryuu :: Pros are the guys making money every month playing GGO.
I hear the top players earn from 200,000 to 300,000 yen a month.
And because of that,
the best players in GGO put in time and effort that’s leagues beyond that of players of other games.
As if I’d stand a chance against them.

HorribleSubs :: The pros are the ones who can earn money in GGO every single month.
A top player can make anywhere from 200,000 to 300,000 yen a month.
For that reason, the high-level GGO players
spend far more time and passion on their game than other MMO players.
I can’t just log in and expect to match them.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 8.

That’s what happens when you spread your Seed everywhere, Kirito.

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE08.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 08

Commie :: Since the Seed went public,
all kinds of shady virtual worlds have popped up.
Which means the only way to get at the truth
is to make contact with them within the game.

FFF :: Ever since The Seed went public, all kinds of shady virtual worlds have popped up.
That means that making contact with them from inside the game is the only way to get to the truth.

Hiryuu :: Ever since the Seed was released, \Nall sorts of shady VR worlds have sprouted forth.
That’s why if we’re going to try to catch them,
we have no choice but to make contact in the game ourselves.

HorribleSubs :: Since The Seed went public,
all kinds of shady virtual worlds have popped up.
Which means the only way to get at the truth
is to make contact with them within the game.

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

Expanded 9.

Of course he will. Protagonist-kun never backs down when the chips are on the table!

Audio: [mp3t track=”http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SAOE09.mp3″ play=”Start audio” stop=”Pause this shit” volslider=”y”]

Sword Art Online II Extended 09

Commie :: Of course, we’ll take every safety precaution.
And I won’t tell you to get shot.
Just tell me your impressions and give me your judgment.
Will you go?

FFF :: Of course, we’ll take every safety precaution.
I’m not telling you to go get shot.
Just tell me your impressions, and give me your judgment.
Will you do this?

Hiryuu :: We’ll of course take utmost care to ensure your safety.
We’re not asking you to get shot.
You just need to make a judgment based on what you observe.
You’ll do it, right?

HorribleSubs :: Of course, we’ll take every safety precaution.
And I won’t tell you to get shot.
Just tell me your impressions, and give me your judgment.
Will you go?

just rewatch ALO, which is legit the best arc fuck the mainstream :: N/A. They all suck.

46 thoughts on “Translation Party: [Commie vs FFF vs Hiryuu vs HorribleSubs] The Best Anime of All the Ever Times Ever (Episode 01)”

  1. Overall scores…
    Commie: 4 times
    FFF: 5 times
    Hiryuu: 9 times
    HorribleSubs: 0 times
    Looks like your best bet is Hiryuu

    Reply
  2. You fucked up Expanded 3 btw: “Dialogue: 100,0:07:06.28,0:07:09.90,Default,,0,0,0,,That the virtual and real worlds only differ by the amount of data.”

    As for the results…

    Overall scores…
    Commie: 2 times
    FFF: 9 times
    Hiryuu: 6 times
    HorribleSubs: 1 time
    Looks like your best bet is FFF

    I watched FFF. I remembered some of their lines that I picked over the other releases when I recognized it. Most of Hiryuu’s lines were picked in the first half of the TL party as to FFF in the 2nd half.

    Reply
  3. Overall scores…
    Commie: 4 times
    FFF: 6 times
    Hiryuu: 3 times
    HorribleSubs: 0 times
    Looks like your best bet is FFF

    Fansubbing is alive and well.

    Reply
  4. Commie: 1 time
    FFF: 4 times
    Hiryuu: 11 times
    HorribleSubs: 2 times
    Looks like your best bet is Hiryuu

    I dunno if this is my final answer, though. I might wait and see how things turn out first.

    Reply
  5. Commie: 2 times
    FFF: 9 times
    Hiryuu: 4 times
    HorribleSubs: 5 times
    Looks like your best bet is FFF

    I actually watched the FFF release already.

    Reply
  6. Commie: 5 times
    FFF: 6 times
    Hiryuu: 9 times
    HorribleSubs: 4 times
    Looks like your best bet is Hiryuu

    Hiryuu often didn’t flow as well as others, but it got the ideas across more accurately most of the time. I might consider another group if my votes weren’t spread so evenly across the CR family. They had some really good hits, but their misses would bug me more to watch than Hiryuu’s occasionally awkward phrasing.

    Reply
  7. Just on the essential.
    Overall scores…
    Commie: 5 times
    FFF: 5 times
    Hiryuu: 7 times
    HorribleSubs: 5 times
    Looks like your best bet is Hiryuu

    I was going to switch to FFF since they decided to release the series, but after this TL Party I’m definitely sticking with Hiryuu.

    Reply
  8. Commie: 0 times
    FFF: 0 times
    Hiryuu: 9 times
    HorribleSubs: 0 times
    Looks like your best bet is Hiryuu

    What the? I watched Hiryuu’s v0 so I expected some bias but still… Ain’t even doing the expanded.

    Reply
  9. Commie: 2 times
    FFF: 4 times
    Hiryuu: 3 times
    HorribleSubs: 0 times
    Looks like your best bet is FFF

    Going with FFF as I had already made up my mind on that before hand by doing my own comparison of each release. =P

    Reply
      • I’ve noticed; apparently several spam databases think my email address is spam related. I can’t even comment on wordpress.com hosted sites since they’ve blocked my email address completely. Have to use a different email address just to comment. -_-

        Reply
        • Unlike most sites, I try my damndest to check Crymore’s spam folder. Sometimes I accidentally delete all spam, but generally I will look through it every day to make sure people in situations like yours don’t get lost in the shuffle.

          I wish Akismet was better so I wouldn’t have to do that though.

          Reply
  10. Overall scores…
    Commie: 0 times
    FFF: 5 times
    Hiryuu: 8 times
    HorribleSubs: 3 times
    Looks like your best bet is Hiryuu

    Been a while since I’ve done one of these. I wanted to N/A a lot, but that kinda defeats the purpose of the party.

    Time to go watch Hiryuu’s which I just finished downloading.

    Reply
  11. Overall scores…
    Commie: 6 times
    FFF: 9 times
    Hiryuu: 4 times
    HorribleSubs: 7 times
    Looks like your best bet is FFF

    Yeah, it was pretty obvious that Commie was trying to make themselves sound different. Too bad it fucked up the meaning of the translation.

    Reply
  12. Overall scores…
    Commie: 1 time
    FFF: 3 times
    Hiryuu: 5 times
    HorribleSubs: 0 times
    Looks like your best bet is Hiryuu

    Wow, that’s really weird. I watched HS btw.
    It’s only me or many options has a same script?

    Reply
  13. Overall scores…
    Commie: 2 times
    FFF: 2 times
    Hiryuu: 2 times
    HorribleSubs: 7 times
    Looks like your best bet is HorribleSubs

    Reply
  14. Overall scores…
    Commie: 4 times
    FFF: 1 time
    Hiryuu: 2 times
    HorribleSubs: 0 times
    Looks like your best bet is Commie

    I liked the meta lines, but I voted N/A because <3 Kirito.

    Reply
  15. Overall scores…
    Commie: 3 times
    FFF: 3 times
    Hiryuu: 3 times
    HorribleSubs: 3 times
    It’s a tie between Commie, FFF, Hiryuu, and HorribleSubs

    Fuck me

    Reply
  16. Looks like this one goes to FFF. I’m so glad they picked up Zankyou no Terror. All we need now is someone to pick up Black Butler: Book of Circus and this season will be complete. IMO I think this is a very good season. The excitement I had when I first started watching anime is slowly coming back to me.

    Reply
  17. Overall scores…
    Commie: 5 times
    FFF: 12 times
    Hiryuu: 8 times
    HorribleSubs: 8 times
    Looks like your best bet is FFF

    Why is Hatsuyuki not in here?

    Reply
  18. Overall scores…
    Commie: 5 times
    FFF: 5 times
    Hiryuu: 5 times
    HorribleSubs: 4 time
    It’s a tie between Commie, FFF, and Hiryuu

    Fuck my life.

    Reply
  19. Commie: 4 times
    FFF: 3 times
    Hiryuu: 3 times
    HorribleSubs: 2 times
    Looks like your best bet is Commie

    4-3-3, almost a tie.

    Reply
  20. Overall scores…
    Commie: 2 times
    FFF: 3 times
    Hiryuu: 10 times
    HorribleSubs: 1 time
    Looks like your best bet is Hiryuu

    lol my ass at N/A answers.

    Reply
  21. Yeah, Going with FFF for now, but when blurays hit it’ll another story. Most likely grabbing raws and splicing in hiryuu’s subs, or both FFF and hiryuu. We’ll see when we get there.

    Reply
  22. Overall scores…
    Commie: 0 times
    FFF: 1 time
    Hiryuu: 5 times
    HorribleSubs: 0 times
    N/A 3 times
    Looks like your best Sinon provider is Hiryuu.

    Reply
  23. Overall scores…
    Commie: 11 times
    FFF: 5 times
    Hiryuu: 1 time
    HorribleSubs: 1 time
    Looks like your best bet is Commie

    Reply
  24. Overall scores…
    Commie: 3 times
    FFF: 6 times
    Hiryuu: 6 times
    HorribleSubs: 2 times
    It’s a tie between FFF and Hiryuu

    I’ve been streaming it on my phone like a pleb up till now

    Reply
  25. Commie: 0 times
    FFF: 6 times
    Hiryuu: 0 times
    HorribleSubs: 3 times
    Looks like your best bet is FFF

    I’m studying in japanese kanji ,
    so I must say that FFF and HorribleSubs is the most accurated sub and other is just below average or sucks.

    Reply

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