Vidya Review: Major/Minor: Major Problems/Minor Upside

Just kidding; there is no upside. This game is ass.

I’ll admit it — as with most of my video game purchases, I acquired Major/Minor solely for the promise of anime tits. But after I bought this game, I realized I had been bamboozled in the worst possible way.

Yes, that header image is nothing more than a clever optical illusion, as if you force your eyes upward just a bit, you’ll see those “anime tits” are, in fact, furry tits. #Catfished.

To ensure no one else would make the mistake I did, I decided to review the game. May my pain be your gain.

 

 

 

Plot/Gameplay

“You” have just won the greatest lottery of all time: a yearlong Japanese concert tour with Klace — the most important and popular popstar in the entire furry world. Who is also a millionaire. And did I mention he’s a millionaire?

But trouble is afoot in Furry Tokyo! Someone’s been copying the Persona 4 plotline and it’s up to you to stop them. …by not playing this redneck rape dungeon of a game.

As this is a budget visual novel, the only gameplay comes from clicking through poorly written self-insert fanfiction as you are occassionally stopped to make a “choice”. And I put “choice” in quotation marks cuz the game makes it abundantly clear what it wanted you to do in each scenario.

Even without the heavy-handed guilt trip bullshit, the game is overwrought in the descriptions of its one-trope characters.

Perhaps the game’s target audience is too stupid to feel insulted by this, but I think the shitbag dev could have thrown a bone to those who accidentally found themselves playing this garbage. It’s only polite.

 

 

 

Shit’s Fucking Weird

Yeah, I know I could take some cheap shots at the furry fandom here, but who wants to deal with being e-picketed by Autism Awareness groups? Instead, I’m gonna talk about how god-awful & cringey this shit can get if you somehow manage to find yourself more than a line or two into the game.

First up is the awkward fetishization of “the foreign”.

Look, I get how someone could take a look at another culture and say, “Hey, that shit looks better than what I’ve got here. Why can’t I have that?” According to Wikipedia, over 7 billion non-Americans do exist.

But when you make a game about how fucking sugoi that there Japan is, and try to prove your point with this kinda shit…

…I mean, it’s hard to not feel offended on behalf of Japan.

 

But the cringe doesn’t end there.

If you didn’t think some societal outcast making a game based around how “super fucking awesome” his fursona is was gonna stop at just one character… he bases the entire fucking game around his fucked-up sense of social norms. I mean, just look at these fucking screenshots.

No well-adjusted person could come up with those lines. Regardless of what Disney says, not everyone should reach for their dreams. Some of them should try high-diving into cement.

 

 

 

Furgrish

This game was clearly put together by someone for whom even the spelling of GED would be a Herculean task.

 

Quotation marks and semicolons are randomly strewn throughout the (what only technically qualifies as) text…

…idioms are wrong and words are misspelled…

…and pluralization is handled with fucking apostrophes…

Ignoring the mistakes (as hard as that might be), the writing is an insult to the very concept of literacy itself. I have a folder overflowing with examples of this rancid alphabet soup, but I’ll limit it to just one more so your brain doesn’t black out in self-defense.

If you want more, enjoy the hangover.

 

 

 

~The End~

The game thankfully ends after just 40 minutes, imploring you to replay it, and promising updates to the game “every month” (until the end of time, apparently?). Yet after this first chapter, even the most far-gone furfags should have enough sense to cut their losses. Not even furries deserve to be subjected to this blatantly low-quality cash grab.

On the one hand, I feel entirely entitled to a refund for this shit (cuz Steam offers those now). On the other, I think it’s really fucking funny that I paid $10 for the literary equivalent of a forever-virgin’s micropenis masturbation.

Guess you can keep my money, Klace. Maybe spend it on a diving cap.

 

Overall score: 2/10